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Eating Disorder Recovery Message Board

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Re: Hi, I am new
Jun 18, 2005
[QUOTE=robin22]Thank you for your response. Life seems really hard right now. I just am not sure how to cope. I have been purging all the time. I can't seem to stop. Not even when problems come from it. In real life people just get so mad at me. They think it is a choice .... But it isn't really, after a while it chooses you and you have no control over it.
I want so much to keep going to my therapist. It helped me a lot more this week.
But I can't afford it. I don't know what to do. My husband is so angry all the time. More now since he knows I am not eating and I purge.
My kids are confused with it all. I just feel I am adding a lot more stress on them here. I feel so guilty.
I don't know where to turn.
Thank you so much for replying to me.[/QUOTE]

It is so not a choice, I agree. Why would you choose to destroy yourself in such a way? A lot of times it starts out with a diet to try and lose weight and you think you're in control of it and then it just becomes an obsession. I really understand the husband thing. Mine is always like 'did you eat?', 'what did you eat?', 'is that [B]all[/B] you ate today?' Then if I take what he feels is too long in the bathroom he'll ask 'did you throw up?'. He's gotten educated in ED's by reading, but he still has a long way to go. He's really trying, though. It might help if yours would educate himself so he can understand a little of what your going through. Just a thought. :) Regarding the therapy, the therapist I'm seeing charges me a very modest fee of $30/45-min. session. Her regular fee is about $150/session. :eek: I went over the net with a fine-toothed comb numerous times trying to find someone with a specialty in ED's. It took me a long while to find her but it was well worth it. I totally didn't think there was anyone in my area, and then I looked again and I found her. I must have missed her the first time I searched. Keep trying, you'll find someone to work with you. :)

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