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Eating Disorder Recovery Message Board


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Angel,
Hi and welcome to the board!! I'm sorry your girlfriend is having to face her ED again.
Switching from one ED to another or having a mix of different EDs is normal so for your girlfriend to have gone from being anorexic to bulimic is completely normal. Well normal in the sense that many people with EDs do it.
Hiding an ED is also normal ED behavior. The fact that you're trying to help her says you care a great deal about her, but there really is not much you can do exept support her and let her know you're there. She has to figure out what's going on with her herself and then deal with it and make peace with it.
Yeah, it's strange but most of us start out EDs because we feel like we're not in control and there are many upsetting things in our lives we can't deal with and so we starve or binge and purge or over exercise or binge. Then the ED itself gets out of control and we feel even less in control but yet we can't stop because it's become a part of us and not eating or binging is the only thing that makes life more bearable if only for that happy couple of seconds when we stand on the scale and see that we've lost weight.
Well everyone is different so there really isn't anything I can really tell you to talk to her about. I have a friend that is just there and I know I can talk to her any time I want, I appreciate that more than someone who just can't seem to stop talking to me about my ED~it comes off as an attack. Plus, they don't understand that this isnt' about food or eating, eating disorders have almost nothing to do with that.
In general I would say don't talk to her about her weight as for most people that's a trigger of their ED. Don't tell her she looks skinny unless she asks you how she looks. Support, giving her a constant that she can count on is one of the things that really help. Keep me posted in how she's doing!! I really hope she as well as you have had some better days since you wrote this post. I'm always here to listen.
Lily





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