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Eating Disorder Recovery Message Board

Eating Disorder Recovery Board Index

Chookie, God bless you! You are a great example to follow. :) Gaining weight is difficult but once a person has reached over the hurdle, then it is all down hill from there. That is where it all works out. Support, family- those who are on the same page as you (stay close to them at this time), and use professionals to help. Nutritionists are very good at helping during a time like this. Therapists too, are good at helping with sorting out the positive and negative thinking patterns, and helping a person get through this difficult time with their relationships that are causing them grief- how to cope.

My weight gain occured like this:

I've been anorexic through all my teenage- college age years up until the age of about 22. DH got me into counseling when we first got married. The therapist helped me with my thinking patterns. I gained 10 pounds that first year. That was a huge help.

Then about 5 years later we began infertility treatments. That was a nightmare. The shots, treatments, meds, surgeries, all took a toll on my body. I gained about 7-8 pounds with each procedure. So, my weight went up considerably. It was awful. But I would do it and do absolutely 'anything' at that point to have a baby! It wasn't in our life plan, and we ended up adopting in 2001. In 2000- I had endometriosis and fibriod cysts so badly that they had a full hysterectomy done. I was just 30 years old. :( I felt much better after the surgery physically. Emotionally, it was not good. The weight gain was terrible. I couldn't cope.

So, there I was with all this weight. I couldn't lose it. I tried to exercise and diet, and it would not come off. Why? I was now taking Estrogen -HRT meds. OH boy!!! After we adopted the boys I soon found out I had Bipolar Disorder. When I went on the meds for the Bipolar Disorder I began to lose some weight because of the side effects from the meds, then, however, I turned manic due to stress from being a sudden mom, and lack of help from others with all the anger bottled up inside of me. It all soon reached a boil, and then exploded into a full blown manic episode, and which I became anorexic- and that happens to some people when they are manic. I lost weight again to the point where the pdoc told me if I lost anymore I was going to be put into the hospital- and then he asked me 'if I wanted to be away from my boys for that long of time'. So, it was go to the hospital- or gain some weight. So, I chose to gain some weight. I began to eat healthy again. I stayed at that weight for about a year. Then I was put on a new psych med, and then it all went down hill from there. I gained, and gained, and gained. Now I weigh 15 pounds more than my highest weight in my weight bracket. It is so upsetting.

The psych meds, HRT drug, eating disorder, and anorexia, all have messed up my metabolism. I've tried to lose the 15 pounds to reach my normal weight, but it seems near to impossible. I cry all of the time. Never did I see myself looking like this. I'm also bulimic. But, my pdoc has me on a medication that helps with that- and that was a med which helped me lose the weight from the infertility drugs. It is a medication that is used for both Epilipetic Seizures, bulimia, and Bipolar patients. When he put me on it he didn't think I would become anorexic again- but then he discovered I could control the behavior with behavior modification through therapy and journaling.

Not food journaling. Journaling about my emotions and feelings. I didn't write anything about the calories consumed, but how I felt when I ate, and why I felt so anxious, or if I binged, why I was binging: Was it because I was avoiding a certain person, situation, etc.? And, then proceed further from there into the journaling into more indepth of why I was binging from that situation. It really helped pull me out of the anorexic phase the last time.

Eating to gain weight the last time. Hubby monitored everything I ate. He would even call me at times to make sure I was eating- and healthy food too. And, yoga for exercise only when I was doing this. That way, I wouldn't over do anything. Yoga was a very relaxing form of exercise- it calmed the nerves and mind down.

In my family, eating disorders are common. It is hereditary- genetically based to a variable degree. My cousin has one, my grandmother had one, I have one, and my twin sister had one for a while while she was in high school and I think my mom has one as well. Not all are that way, but they can be passed along due to the gene pool as well. Scary huh?

Always know what your triggers are, and know how to a) either respond to them or b) have coping mechanisms to deal with them. That is what my therapist has taught me. It is hard, and day to day battle. If I forget what my tdoc has told me, then I pay a penalty of facing my actions. :(

Again, I wrote- another long book. Oops! Can you tell I have absolutely - no one to talk to? :rolleyes:

Have a nice morning ladies



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