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Eating Disorder Recovery Message Board


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[QUOTE=samsa135;5029825]Hi,

I would say that there are a lot of things that can occur after "getting over" and eating disorder. Granted, it will never really go away. It is a mental disorder and cant be cut out or radiated away.



I disagree whole heartedly. I was told that after an 11 year battle with Bulimia, that I'd never totally get over it because the mental disorder business. It really depends on how you handle it. For me it was hypnotherapy, and that really worked for me. It was about respecting myself and making decisions that were good for me, not just on a food level, but a whole-life level. I did hypnosis, and the changes were immediate and phonominal for me. Before the hypnosis I was not open to talking to anyone, including my psychotherapist. And so eating disorder treatment was not going terribly quickly for me. I was gaining results, but not enough to really turn my whole world around. So, but the first thing hypnosis did for me was it really changed my interest and motivation to start speaking about what was going on inside me. It was a whole unexpected shift, even to my therapist. She commented on how open and communicative I was after that first hypnosis session. Then I found myself giving up my family's religion that I had grown up with my whole life because it didn't fit for me. It was a rough time and my parents couldn't understand, but we did eventually get through that and they've come to accept that I am not following their religion. And they're finally ok with that, enough so that we're very peaceful about our difference. I think that whole paradigm shift for me was the biggest part of my recovery to be honest. I feel like the minute I let go of trying to make religion work for me, I was in a healthier mindstate and was getting better with the eating disorder so much more rapidly. And then 6 months later I was ending therapy because I had made so much progress that I was feeling good about where I was at and my therapist was feeling good at where I was at.

I did have once in a blue moon episodes where I'd find myself binging and then purging, I had episodes after I left therapy that I somehow managed because I had gained enough tools in my toolbox by that point to work with the little backslides. But then in time the backslides were definitely much more noticeably less. I'm talking maybe I'd backslide with one purging episode maybe, oh let's say once in a six month period of time. Then maybe once within a years time. And then, I don't know when it happened, it was most likely a gradual process over a longer period of time, but I was beginning to notice I wasn't shy about my body and I actually could look in the mirror and say, hey, I look sexy today. And I'd really mean it, none of this fake it til you make it stuff. I really wasn't worried about my body, and I was eating junkfood with friends without wondering how to sneak away to the bathroom, or anything like that. I was just living like a normal person.

And let me tell you, I haven't backslid at all in at least 2.5 years. I ended psychotherapy in 2006 So here we are in 2012, so that means I was dealing with some residual backslides here and there for around 3.5 years after officially ending therapy. And my life is so much nicer being full of so many other cares rather than how fat I am and what I am going to eat.

The great thing I was noticing just the other day is my emotional eating patterns are now fading, too. It used to be that my mind would always be thinking about what I was going to eat next and when I was stressed I would overeat. Now, lately I'm noticing that my stress levels are super high and I'm not dealing with the urge to eat. There's just no drive to cram a bunch of food down my throat to drown my sorrows. And that's a huge thing for me. I actually don't remember a day in my life where I haven't stress eaten, even as a little kid. It really feels good to claim this degree of success after so many folks told me I would never fully recover and be normal because the ed was this mental disorder I was now going to have the rest of my life.

I dont' know what it is, but I'm a fighter, and maybe that's how I've been able to come this far out of my 11 year stint with bulimia and overeating. I've put on weight, of course, and I still like my body. I think it's sexy and I wasn't ever all that fearful to flaunt in front of my bf when he and I were still together. I think it was him helping me a bit, though, by telling me he loved my body. And for whatever reason I was definitely at a point then where I was able to believe him and enjoy it. If your still in the eating disorder mindset it isn't going to be easy to hear and believe someone when they say that kind of thing, but I had definitely progressed pretty well into recovery and was already believing in my own mind that I was sexy and pretty.And to hear it from someone else just gave me what I needed in order to not someday question that belief.

I am on a mission to personal growth in my life, it's this innate drive I have. I'm always working on myself and maybe that's part of my success, but I do believe that if you tell yourself that you won't ever fully recover and you will have the ed mental disorder even long after your solidly into recovery...that's just what your going to end up with. If you keep your options open and believe there is some possiblity of full recovery to the poit where it seems weird that you even did have an eating disorder once upon a time, it's likely you will find your way to that spot, too. But the ed mental disorder is a bunch of hogwash in my experience. Only believe it if you want to be tied to your ed for the rest of your life because what you beileve is more than likely what you'll get.





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