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Grief & Loss Message Board


Grief & Loss Board Index


Re: Loss of parents
May 18, 2006
Oh Sweetie, another orphan...I'll adopt you! :D I am an orphan too...and you're never too old to be one...I'm finding that out.

I lost my mom in aug. 05 and my dad in april 81.....my mom was only sick for a few months and it took it's toll, so I can't imagine caring for two sick parents for what was probably an extended amount of time....I'm truly sorry.

I do know that many times, spouses who are sick like that and were together for a long time, die very close to each other. A gentleman at my mom's hospice had a heart attack and died the day his wife was burried... and my great grandpa died 1 year to the day after my grandma...he just didn't want to be here with out her. It is much better for them, but soooo very hard on us...isn't it...hardly seems fair....they're up there dancing, celebrating and enjoying life as it should be and we're still here cleaning up the pieces.

I don't know if you listen to country or not, but there is a song called "Where've you been" by Kathy Mattea....it's beautiful and talks a bit about the situation that your parents were in...I listen to it on my bad days because it reminds me that although I don't "have" parents anymore, they definitely have each other.

I know that "they're in a better place" is a statement that should never be made in front of someone who's still grieving...it causes lots of pain, makes you want to kick the person who said and stomp like a child and say, "Yeah, so I'm a little stingy, I'd rather them be down here with ME!!!!!" It's a conclusion you have to come to in your own time and when you're ready. It does feel good when you can say it to yourself and mean it. It doesn't mean you are glad they're gone, just glad they're at peace.

If we can help at all, just holler, there are so many of us here, someone's bound to be able to help you put the pieces back togeher....when you're ready.

.....................Angel

p.s. am I to assume the GSDLover is for german shepherds?? I have one sitting in my lap right now! She is my service dog and also thinks she's a lap dog! Gotta love it! She's a black and red plush coat namded Phoenix. :wave:





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