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Grief & Loss Message Board


Grief & Loss Board Index


Hi Topa,
Im so sorry for your loss. I know the fog, going through the motions and not really being able to enjoy anything around you as you are just numb...
I lost my dear sweet mother 9 years ago on the 16th June, 2000. Like you, I too tended to my mother, she was ill for a long time and ended up in hospital finally her body just gave out, and went home to die, she only lasted a week more. Her three youngest children including me (38years old at the time) were at her side, it was actually a wonderful passing, but still no matter how peaceful no matter how much prepared one might be, it doesnt take away the empty feeling and it is not something that you can put a time line to be done with the grief, as everyone is different and even now I have hard times, I miss her terribly, she was my best friend, like sisters we were, and one of the most loving wise people ive ever known.. And she is gone..... My family went in different directions, all 7 of her children were really only glued together with family gatherings and such by only one person, her, she was the hub to the wheel. We are now just starting to do things as family celibrations go.
It hasnt even been a year for you, bless you, all i can offer is my heart and a shoulder any time... My neice said to me one day, to not be selfish in my suffering, that is something that many do, as we feel either we cant talk to anyone as they wont understand or we feel that most everyone has heard it and arent interested anymore.
Hope that if the grief therapy is coming to a close that there is someone that is there that maybe you can talk with sometimes. (dont know if it a group therapy or not) All I can say is it takes time and one day you will start to do things, one day you will see life again without the empty numbness, one day you will smile again and laugh and mean it when you do. But for now, its ok to be numb and it is certainly ok for you to truly miss her. Bless you





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