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Hearing Disorders Message Board

Hearing Disorders Board Index

[QUOTE=THE EAR]January 11, 2001. Life as I new it ended. My left ear was plugged with wax. The doctor could not flush it out. I tried mineral oil which made it worse. Desperatly, I tried plunging it with my hand. I was MAD that my weekend was Ruined by this. I was mad that I wasn't out drinking and partying. I was fed up with my ears always getting plugged with wax. Suddenly, I flew into a blind rage. I raised my hand and punched my ear three times. Each time I heard a sound like tin paper being hit. Then there was a low, horrifying hum. I went to Dr. Mackintosh ENT. It was 2001. Surely, there would be a way to fix it and stop the maddening popping. Instead, he said, "you have a perforated ear drum. It will heal in six weeks.". I could not imagine six weeks of this torture. Six weeks later, the hearing returned, but the crackling and popping remained. I had to quit my job as I could not function. Gradually, the popping lessened, but then the thumping came. It was horrible. When this happened, I would clench my fists and growl like an old man. October 19 2001, I had botox injections to freeze the defective muscles that caused the thumping. I believed that this long ordeal was over. Then I got patulous eustachian tube dysfunction which was almost as horrible. June 28 2002, I had my eustachian tube narrowed. This stopped the PETD and the thumping but in December 2002, the thumping returned. Once again, my life was destroyed. It has now been two years, 10 months since my life was destroyed. What it feels like is my eustachian tube is damaged and must be de-comissioned. My left ear always feels raw and uncomfortable. I believe that the eustachian tube must be plugged with a ventilating tube in my ear drum. Then the defective muscles must be permanently frozen. The result, NO THUMPING and no PATULOUS EUSTACHIAN TUBE DYSFUNCTION. My life will nearly be back to normal. I have only EXISTED, not LIVED for the past three years. I want my life back. I don't believe that a LIFE SENTENCE is justified for one act of stupidity. I WILL find a way out of THIS. If I do not like or can't Stand something, I DO something about it. If there is no way out, I will go out my OWN WAY.[/QUOTE]

Sorry to hear what you have been through. I am 50. One thing I can say is this. If your Docs. have told you that you have nothing life threatening be Glad. Think of those that do. There are not always fixes for some of our injuries. I have an ear problem.....contant well as cervical spine problems with chronic pain. We have to sometimes learn to live with these things. Just tell yourself that. Many people with many disabilities go on to lead very productive lives. Don't be so hard on yourself. You must learn to live with this.
And I bet if you stop being angry at yourself you will do just fine.
Take Care.

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