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Thanks for the advice, Dsnap! It sounds like you were so lucky, to have your adopted baby kind of fall right in your lap! That definitely sounds like it was just meant to be. I sort of doubt anything that miraculous would ever happen to me, but hey, you never know. God does seem to work in mysterious ways, aned things do often work out for the best, I've noticed.

Happy New Year, Sara! :wave: You sound so upbeat, it's kind of infectious. I believe you should follow your heart. If you really want to be a Mom, then I think you can achieve it. It's all about what you are willing to sacrifice to get it. If you set your heart on this goal, you will get there. I still think you could legitimately try IUI another time or two, but if you want to skip right to IVF, I'm sure your RE would be happy to oblige. Mine has told me she won't even let me do any more IUI since it doesn't seem to be working. I don't disagree with that. Did you read that one of those women who just got pregnant from IVF did 25 IUI's? That seems like a lot. She must have spent a fortune. I am satisfied after three times that it is not going to work.

Anyhoo, I think you're right that it's ok to want motherhood. It's a natural thing that most people get to experience without any angst at all. In fact, so many (including my Momster) get pregnant by accident that their only angst is that they don't really want the kid. So we're put in this weird position of thinking, thinking, thinking about this, and analyzing exactly what we are willing to sacrifice to get it, and all the pros and cons about motherhood. Most people, like my stepdaughter, think to themselves, hey, I think I'd like to be a parent, it's about the right time, and they try for a few months and BOOM! They're pregnant. No self doubts about being punished by God, no thoughts about how much they are willing to spend chasing this dream, etc. I've got one friend who says I'm overthinking this problem and she's probably right. She says that $11,000 is not much money to spend, and that if I don't try IVF, in five years I will have a total meltdown for failing to try every possible option.

That's a seductive argument! I'm famous for making decisions that I regret later.

But I don't know, Sara. I'm still swimming in my sea of indecision. I liked your idea of stepping back from this for a week or so to just clear my head. But then I would come back to this Board and prowl around. Obsessed, I guess! :)

I think I will probably call my RE next week and sign up for the IVF class she wants me to take. I guess my RE gives it once a month, so I would take it sometime in January. I guess it couldn't hurt to have some more information.

By the way, my infertility is pretty much undiagosed, except we know dh's sperm is not the world's greatest. He had a vasectomy reversal which has impacted the amount available. They still swim around but there's not as many of them. I have been pregnant the natural way by him twice but neither pregnancy was successful. The most recent time was a miscarriage in September, 2002. My feeling is that I'm just kind of old, and when you combine that with dh's sperm problem, the result is infertility. The doctor said my miscarriage was no big deal, no reason I can't conceive again. He said 40% of women miscarry. But ...... that was well over a year ago, and all those months of great sex and four months of clomid and three rounds of IUI have not produced another pregnancy. Sigh.

Well, keep me posted on your thought process! I'm all ears.


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