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I came across this post and just had to reply. Everything that everyone feels is completely normal, sometimes you think you are the only one that feels that way. I have a 15 year old from my first marriage and she was unplanned, I had her at 25. When she was around 2, I split from my husband and remarried when my daughter was 5. Now my second husband wanted to wait to have kids until we had the house, etc...... at this point I think I was around 33 and he decided it was time. Well after a 6 months of trying nothing, went for testing to find out my tubes were blocked. I then went to a fertility clinic who did the tests and found out I had PID (pelvic inflammatory Disease) and endometriosis, I underwent lap surgery and then did some IUIs and still nothing. In the meantime my SIL got pregnant and was supposedly "not trying". I flipped out and cried like a baby when my husband told me. It was all i thought about all the time. We werent close but of course every opportunity for her to show off she did. I chose to avoid her. Right around this time they called to say they were coming down and I couldnt face her, I had to leave for a few hours. It wasnt until a few months later that I finally realized I had to face her. After calling us every weekend to go out to eat and declining, I knew i couldnt avoid her forever, so I agreed. They came down to go out to dinner with us and I had to fight back tears, it was the hardest thing I ever had to do.
After this I didnt see her for a while, then came the shower which I decided not to go to. At the time I did what was best for me. I was very upset that my husband made us wait to try and I took it out on him also. Months later we got around to talking about IVF and I convinced him to one try. We then took out a 2nd mortgage to do this. Well about 1 month before SIL's baby was born we did it (even though the docs gave us no hope) and to our surprise I was pregnant. It couldnt have come at a better time because I just dont know how I would have handled even seeing the baby once it was born. I did have an eventful pregnancy during the end but it was worth it. Now when my baby daughter was 15 months old I got sick and to our surprise I got pregnant naturally. I was 37 at the time of this 3rd pregnancy. Now this was after two laparscopy surgeries to unblock my tubes and at this point didnt even know if the tubes were functioning, so this was a big surprise for both of us. When we told the family they were shocked and happy for us. Now for the kicker: (i hate to sound mean but this is just goes to show what comes around goes around) My sister in law then started to avoid me and not come around, even on the thanksgiving holiday after my pregancy news. I even showed up at her son's birthday party because my husband couldnt make it and can you believe she totally ignored me and didnt say a word. Also around this time I heard they were trying for a 2nd child and were unsuccessful and also had some miscarriages. It actually wasnt until about one year later she had a successful pregnancy. Now she understood the hurt she had put me through. So it actually did hurt her to see me pregnant, escpecially someone like me who had such a rough time since I guess it was very unexpected. Once she did get pregnancy though with her 2nd, that was the time she started coming around again, so I guess all of this jealousy stuff is very normal.

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