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Hi Princess! Of course i will tell my story. It always amazes me when I think back to what my life has been like for the last 3 1/2 years. and i think that is why it is so hard for me to believe I am finally pregnant.

DH and I were married in summer 2002. He was 32, I was 28. After just about 2 years of marriage, it was spring 2004, and we sat down one day and talked about children. DH was nervous. He said he wasn't sure it was time. We were both used to living the way we wanted, not being tied down, doing what we pleased and he knew it would be a big change. so i suggested to him, that I would need to go off bcp and it might take a few months for my body to regulate itself so i was sure we wouldn't get preg. right away. That summer for our anniversary we were heading to Alaska on vacation and decided when we got back we'd start to ttc.

So in fall of 2004, we officially started. months passed with nothing happening. In January i started using OPK's. tried that for months. Saw my OB/GYN, she suggested since i had been off the pill for almost a year at that point to see an RE. so in April 2005 we did.

At first we did 5 cycles of Clomid in increasing doses. after the 5th cycle at 250mg per day, I gave up on clomid. Had my HSG in August 2005. All clear. DH had his SA in April, all clear. so in fall 2005, we decided on injectables with timed BD. so we did that for 5 cycles. all those injections and still nothing. one incidence of mild OHSS which left me with stretch marks on my tummy. by May of 2006, I was done with injectables and timed BD. It wasn't working. took a break, and had my lap in july 2006. all clear. started in october 2006 with injectables and IUI. Did 4 IUI's with injectables. still nothing. now it was January 2007. I was feeling so hopeless. Decided to switch doctors.

Had to go through all the tests all over again. also found a new OB/GYN. DH had another SA. everything looked good. SA showed some sluggish sperm, but nothing too terrible. so we were still unexplained IF. Did first IVF in April/May 2007, found out June it was BFN. Did second IVF in August/September 2007, finally got the BFP!

So you can see it has been a long road. 5 clomid cycles, 5 injectable cycles with BD, 4 injectable cycles with IUI, and 2 IVF's. The last few years have been so hard, so sad, so frustrating. We were married 5 years this past July and still had no baby. we even postponed our yearly vacation because i was starting my IVF cycle. We are taking the trip next month finally.

So the key is patience. and i am stubborn so i had that drive to keep going and going until i won the battle. i didn't want to be defeated. i wanted a baby so badly. eventually something will click for everyone. for me it was just high technology that i needed to get the job done. Hopefully for the others on this board it won't be such a long road. I think as I progress through this pregnancy, some of the pain of IF will disappear as i anticipate my babies'
arrival, but i will never take it for granted that i have children. i can't forget how we were robbed of a few years of our life where i was constantly sad and angry and depressed. i can't completely forget the pain of going to baby showers for other girls and all those phone calls from my friends announcing they were pregnant and how i had to act happy but felt like crumbling. i think that will make me more sympathetic to others and will truly make me treasure my children.

So whenever IF gets you down, remember there is hope. It may take a while, but you will have a baby in your arms. I had to wait 3 1/2 years for what i wanted but finally it is happening to me. finally.

Thank you all for listening to my story. I hope it is inspiring.





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