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Hi Mapia, I am so glad to see posts from you more often... I really was missing you there for a while! Sounds like you are doing a little bit better, but I understand how IF does not go away even on our good days. In fact, it sounds like it won't go away even once we do get pregnant! I was just reading a post from CBB where she essentially said that IF worries shift after a BFP from "am I ever gonna get pregnant" to "is this pregnancy going to make it to term". Understandable. But I sure do want the opportunity to worry about a pregnancy making it to term, and I know that you do too!!!! We'll just have to keep praying and dreaming. Our time MUST be coming :angel:

You have yourself a nice weekend. Maybe spend some quality time with DH if you can. I'm feeling all romantic cause it's me and DH's wedding anniversary on Monday... 2 yrs married... and 2 relatively tough years of marriage considering we were already struggling to conceive by the time of the wedding. I remember that I took an HPT while we were on our honeymoon. I was so sad that it was another bfn and I remember crying. Oh how hysterical I would have been if I had known another two years of trying and still no baby. :( I really didn't intend to get all sad here... I must say I do feel a bit closer to BFP now that I've had a successful E/R and many embies to work with if I do in fact get a bfn next week. I just wish I could press fast forward on the remote of life, right to the time we both have big fat pregnant bellies. Crossing my fingers that time will be very soon for us!
Hey Kari my dear friend.I have missed you all as well.I will try getting on at least once a day to check on you all.I was really touched by your post you brought tears to my eyes.DH and I started ttc on our wedding night.I dident start worrying about IF for at least 6 months after our wedding.Since I had been pregnant already I was positive DH had some kind of issue.Of course I wasent prepared to hear he is sterile he wasent either.We found out DH was sterile right after our 2 anniversary.Even though we have been ttc for over 3 years we have only know about IF for close to 2 years.It has been a rough road seems like the only time we were truely happy was before our wedding and after then when IF came around seems like we are always sad.I am sick of hearing people telling me not to stress.How can you not stress?Is it possible not to stress if it is I wish someone would tell me what to do.

I know even when we get our BFP we will have other things to worry about but like you said lets get those BFPs and we can worry about those things when we get there.I believe our time is coming as well.We just have to stay positive and not give up hope.Well DH is working today so wont see him till this afternoon and then we are invited to his sisters place for a cook out.Plus AF is here so, so much for wanting to be romantic............lol.That witch always ruins everything.gggrrrrr.......So you enjoy your anniversary weekend have lots of romance with DH.;) I will pray you get the most wonderful anniversary gift ever.So when is beta again?I also recall you saying you will do an HPT on Monday?Keep me updated sweetie and enjoy your weekend.I will pray for you extra hard.Take care my dear dear friend.

Love ya,

Mapia
Kari my dear sweet friend thank you so much for your words of encouragement they mean so much to me.I know IVF has made it possible for so many of us to get pregnant but I am just bitter as if findind out DH cant father our baby isent enough having to turn to donor and going through all these IUI's and then finally as if all that wasent enough you have to go through IVF and shed out all that money.I know I need to stop being bitter cause we are all going through such a rough time but I cant help it at times.I will get past it I just need some time thats all.Anyway thanks for thinking of me after what you are going through this morning.I truely think you are such an amazing person and such a dear kind friend.I love ya lots and sending you hugh hugs sweetie.

Mapia
Kari sweetie reading your post brought tears to my eyes I am sorry DH isent a little more understanding toward your feelings but hey most men arent.Even though my DH is so caring he still cant understand me.I at least admire him for trying to understand.I know my BFP will come just like yours will soon.I wish I could be there to give you a hugh hug and just cry together.I could also use a drink with my IF buddy.I am not a drinker and this weekend I had a drink DH said to me wow you really arent well to want a drink.I wanted to get a buzz but I stopped after the first screwdriver......lol.I am such a whimp.............lol.Want to hear something funny tonight out of the blue DH asked how is your friend Kari is she pregnant I told him about your BFN and he said to tell you he is sorry.The weird part is I dont talk to him about the boards cause he doesnt want me on all the time cause he knows I get upset when one of you gets a BFN.So it just took me by suprise when he asked about you.Anyway I just wanted to forward his message to you that is so sorry and he hopes your next cycle will be the lucky one.Well sweetie hugh hugs from DH and I.Take care and know I am praying for you.

Love ya,

Mapia





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