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Okay, some history: I'm 28, DH is 25. We've been TTC since March 2007, and have been charting temps, cervical mucus, position, etc and using OPKs since we started. No pregnancies whatsoever. Started getting tests done, I've had Day 3, Day 21(well, actually more like Day 28 because I don't ovulate on day 14) blood tests, both normal, pelvic ultrasound showing good follicles and a clear HSG. DH had an SA which showed only 200,000 sperm w/ 30% motility.

Our RE referred us to a reproductive urologist to figure out what's causing the low sperm count. We decided before we went that we would start our first IVF cycle in January (we have great insurance which will pay for it all even though it hasnt been 12 months).

We got to the reproductive urologist. He started off by telling us to forget IVF and that we were "totally and completely jumpinig the gun, so just forget it and don't even give it another thought". He told me "You're young, why rush? You havent even tried for a year!" and then when I brought up DH's sperm count told me "That could be a fluke! He could have a count of 20 million the next time. It can vary." (this is in direct contrast to everything else I've heard -- it can't vary THAT much unless there's a damn good reason).

He said that looking at our histories, the problem is probably me, because I don't ovulate on day fourteen because women are designed to ovulate on day 14 and when they don't, it means they are probably not as fertile and that their egg quality probably isn't as good. He told me that he is surprised they haven't given us clomid because that would probably work. He also told us to stop charting and timing intercourse at all, and to just have it randomly when we feel like it, and that we'd probably be pregnant in a few months.

When I tried to ask questions about hte next steps we could take to figure out DH's sperm count, he snapped at me saying that he wasn't going to bother with "what ifs" or next steps because "For every one scenario you think of, I can think of one hundred".

He then went off on a rant about how IVF is done too much and how couples should just be given clomid and that most of the time, it will work, but that doctors and insurance companies are greedy and that patients aren't willing to try long enough naturally, that we want everything right away.

I'm so mad! He made me feel stupid, and like everything the other doctors have told me was wrong. Wouldnt my RE, or Gyno, or GP have told me that my ovulation was the problem if that was it??? If all my other tests are normal, and I have regular cycles (they vary slightly, but I ALWAYS have 13 day luteal phases. I usually ovulate on CD 21) but DH has a really low sperm count, aren't the chances good that THAT is the issue????

We are supposed to go back for a follow up SA, but I don't want to go. We called our RE and she's ordering us a follow-up SA.

I still want to start our first IVF cycle in January. I can't take the heartbreak of trying naturally for a few more cycles.

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