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Hello. I have posted to other forums on this site before, but never here. I wanted to share our story to get advice, feedback and encouragement. I will do the best I can with your abbriviations, etc.

My wife and I have been TTC for 3 years. I am now 35 and she is 32, almost 33. First 2 years did natural method, trying to time it out etc. After 1.5 years, I went in for SA. Everything was good. Then a few months later, my wife went in for blood and HSG at regular gyno doc. HSG normal and hormones not quite right (can't really remember cause it was a while ago). So clomid for 6 mo. to no avail.

Then referred to IF doc, who ran tests and had us do 1 month to get base levels of everything. Saw that hormones were a little off, so we started 3 mo. stim with every other day u/s and blood for her. Tried first mo. of this natural and the 2nd two mo. with IUI. Nothing there either. Next move IVF.

After this past Thanksgiving we started our IVF cycle with the Folistim, Menopur & women's viagara. This led up to the Dec. 7th egg harvest where we got 16 eggs. After matching my S with them they made 10 embryos, 1 full blast and 3 others close to that. After the 5 days we did a 2 embryo transfer (IVF) & froze the other 2. We then sat back for our 2ww.

Everything seemed to be fine, except for the shot every night and 3 HCG boosters done along the way. Blood tests said everything was normal, but we never asked deep enough questions to get exact levels, etc. Last blood test was last Friday and the call came that we didn't need anymore HCG boost. On monday, X-mas eve, wife had small spotting, we felt wierd about it and I picked up 2 HPT's. She took one and it was BFN. We were devestated and on the verge of hosting x-mas dinner the next day. Tried to keep hope alive by saying she was not a test person (never had an OPK show positive either) and got through the dinner ok. Still small spotting up until tonight when it is now a full blown period.

Our beta test was supposed to be tomorrow (Thurs 27th) and we are still going even though we know it did not work. Emotions have gone from sad and devistated to extremely mad at the process and questioning everything. End our ropes...don't know what to next...or even ask the IF doc.

Through this 3 years, all friends have kids (some on their 2nd). 2 friends gone through the IVF process and were successful on first try. We thought this was the final answer. Nothing is medically wrong according to doc's.

We don't even know how to talk through what's next. Should we try the frozen embryos? I don't want my wife to have to go through much more of this. It kills me to have to do the shots everynight! Is this all for not?

Adoption? Wouldn't even know how to start that process....

Any feedback is appreciated. Regards.
Hi Phil.

I read your post and it sounds similar to what I have experienced in the past. When we started ttc I was 30 and DH was 34. It took us 3.5 years to finally get pg. (So now I am 34 and DH is 37). We tried 6 months of clomid and 7 rounds of injectables, 4 with IUI, and nothing worked. we were labeled as unexplained IF. and just like you, over those years we watched many friends go on to have babies while we sat childless and hopeless. We had to do IVF 2 times to get our miracles. We are now expecting twins. So my point is, don't give up. IVF does not always work on the first try. We had only one frozen embryo after doing the first fresh IVF so we had to do a fresh cycle again. After the first IVF failed, our IVF team met to discuss what went wrong and they didn't really have any suggestions for doing it differently the next time. they said everything had gone along as they had hoped. so we did the same protocol again and it worked. there were many times i thought all those shots in the rear were for nothing, that it would never work, that the pain and anxiety were too much, but i always tried to remind myself that if i wanted a biological child, this was what i had to do. i was devastated when the first IVF didn't work and i was scared it might never work. but you must press on if you both want a biological child and are OK with another IVF. I hope my story gives you hope and strength to continue on the path to parenthood, either by IVF or by adoption. It will happen for you too.

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