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Lyme Disease Message Board


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Hi everyone!! I'm alive.

I'm soooooooooo sorry I can't post as much as I used to, but I am so tired all the time.

I commute fulltime to an office every day and it's so much harder than I thought it would be. Especially when I'm Herx'ing.

I've been on massive abx for 3 years straight including 9 months of IV and I still Herx. I take Levaquin and Doxy and my Lyme rash and Bartonella spots and other symtpoms come and go.

My Lyme rash is on my right shin: a red bumpy oval and very very ITCHY!! My Bartonella rashes look like bruises but are smaller and more pink and red than dark purple.

The past few weeks my eyeballs are burning so bad and my face is so red it's emabarrassing!

I have pain all over, feet especially and some pain that travels. Headaches, fevers, stiffness, etc.

I am quick to anger, quick to cry and still suffer from fatigue.

BUT --- I am able to get up each morning, wash up, dress and commute to an office each day. I am able to handle a very technical job for 8 or so hours then come home and face 2 teenagers. I am able to remember trash day and recycle day, I can remember to bring in the mail, I can pay my mortgage and other bills, and even grocery shop.

I can't do much else - but that's 1000% more than I could handle a year ago.

So .. I still suffer and I'm still in recovery but there is hope.

I eat very heathly and I get enough sleep but each step I take, each little task I have to do is a tremendous effort.

It doesn't help that I lost my sense of balance and I have to walk slow and the oscillopsia (jiggly vision 24/7) is horrid to live with. I know I should go to therapy for it but I just can't handle any more tasks in my life.

No one understands but you guys. No one understands why I cry. My family thinks that since I commute to a job, that all is well with me. They call me but they tune out my complaints.

I was always a skinny minny, and when the Lyme got real bad I gained 90 lbs. I can't stand it anymore. Even getting in and out of my truck makes me huff and puff. I hate showering and looking in mirrors. In my mind's eye I still think I'm my old fit self, then I catch a glimpse of myself in the ladies room mirror and I just want to break down and cry.

I hate seeing new faces here. Makes my heart break. But there is hope. I'm better than I was last year and much better than 2 years ago.

Hang in there guys!!

Peace and health to all,
Mickie
:angel:
[QUOTE=6Blues;3489537]Hi everyone!! I'm alive.

I'm soooooooooo sorry I can't post as much as I used to, but I am so tired all the time.

I commute fulltime to an office every day and it's so much harder than I thought it would be. Especially when I'm Herx'ing.

I've been on massive abx for 3 years straight including 9 months of IV and I still Herx. I take Levaquin and Doxy and my Lyme rash and Bartonella spots and other symtpoms come and go.

My Lyme rash is on my right shin: a red bumpy oval and very very ITCHY!! My Bartonella rashes look like bruises but are smaller and more pink and red than dark purple.

The past few weeks my eyeballs are burning so bad and my face is so red it's emabarrassing!

I have pain all over, feet especially and some pain that travels. Headaches, fevers, stiffness, etc.

I am quick to anger, quick to cry and still suffer from fatigue.

BUT --- I am able to get up each morning, wash up, dress and commute to an office each day. I am able to handle a very technical job for 8 or so hours then come home and face 2 teenagers. I am able to remember trash day and recycle day, I can remember to bring in the mail, I can pay my mortgage and other bills, and even grocery shop.

I can't do much else - but that's 1000% more than I could handle a year ago.

So .. I still suffer and I'm still in recovery but there is hope.

I eat very heathly and I get enough sleep but each step I take, each little task I have to do is a tremendous effort.

It doesn't help that I lost my sense of balance and I have to walk slow and the oscillopsia (jiggly vision 24/7) is horrid to live with. I know I should go to therapy for it but I just can't handle any more tasks in my life.

No one understands but you guys. No one understands why I cry. My family thinks that since I commute to a job, that all is well with me. They call me but they tune out my complaints.

I was always a skinny minny, and when the Lyme got real bad I gained 90 lbs. I can't stand it anymore. Even getting in and out of my truck makes me huff and puff. I hate showering and looking in mirrors. In my mind's eye I still think I'm my old fit self, then I catch a glimpse of myself in the ladies room mirror and I just want to break down and cry.

I hate seeing new faces here. Makes my heart break. But there is hope. I'm better than I was last year and much better than 2 years ago.

Hang in there guys!!

Peace and health to all,
Mickie
:angel:[/QUOTE]
Hi Blues
I am sorry to hear you are having a rough time returning to work . Yeah for you though because you are exerting the effort.
Be careful to take supplements as you probably well know . Also ask your doctor about maybe Kadian or lyrica for the pain unless you already know about them . The Kadian and lyrica lets you function but relieves the nerve pain .
I definately understand the crying . Have you ever tried Lamictal for it . It is usually used for seizures but from what my lyme doc says it can be used for impulse control and I am on 50mg 3 times a day and have had tremendous relief from the crying episodes which are in a weird way part of your impulses.
We understand about weight gain I have gained about forty pounds and it really is annoying but you don't sound shallow so try to not worry to much about it . Easier said than done but I commend you for returning to work .
Do you take advair or anything for the shortness of breath sometimes this can come from the babesis and not just the weight gain .
lucky enough I have had my sense of balance returned mostly unless I am tired and over do it after 16 months of IV therapy Rocephin for 11 months and Zithromax for 4 months
I still haven't conquered the cognitive and nerve pain along with the nerve pain enough to return to work but doc says I am about 60% there which is much more than I was ayear ago.
I know of a doctor that had Lyme himself who has been on Rocephin for 4 years and is doing really well after being diagnosed with ALS so don't give up hope .
We are all still here for you as you have been for us.
I remember you were one of the first persons on the boards that made sense to me and that was very helpful so keep spreading the word od Lyme and maybe some day we won't have to .
Keep us posted and Kudos for you as rough as it has been on you
Take care
Ryebeach





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