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Sexual Health - Men Message Board


Sexual Health - Men Board Index


I'd really like to thank Tex for this information, and I have to say I really agree with the part about the tendency of "holding off" on masturbation to be a form of repressing the normal sexual expression-- it's an essential part of getting sexual satisfaction instead of chasing this otherwise-impossible dream in the waking world, when the desire is in the dreaming mind.

I would also like to add a few bits of my own knowledge:
Technically speaking, "wet dreams" have nothing to do with dreams, but are a involuntary function of the body similar to heartbeat and breathing, while dreams are entirely in the cerebral cortex, the highest part of the brain; while this sexual experience may trigger a sexual dream as the brain tends to try to explain what the person feeling, this is secondary, and a person can have an orgasm while asleep with any dream or even no dream at all-- and dream-content can be influenced by many thought-related factors and issues, from fulfilling a desire, to repressing shame. However, it is definitely a sexual experience, and not some autonomic function like digestion etc; every night, the brain normally goes through a sexual-arousal function as part of the normal sleep-cycle, usually as part of the normal REM dream-sleep shortly before awakening; it's just a normal part of sleep-functions, and is the cause of morning-erections.
This arousal-patter occurs in all normal persons regardless age or gender; however it is normally more pronounced in adolescent and adult males due to higher levels of testosterone, while an adolescent's sexual functioning is even more active due to the fact that it is rapidly growing and developing at this age, and is thus more active than a fully mature function- just as with any other function which is in a state of development. Likewise, testosterone increases the sex drive and makes it easier to have orgasms; as a result, sexual tension increases, bringing the person closer to orgasm at any time, while likewise it's easier to have the orgasm; as a result, the sexual-arousal function simply brings the person close enough to get off completely.

As Tex mentioned, a person can subconsciously inhibit these "wet dreams" or "somnovolent orgasms" by decreasing sexual tension through a sort of self-willed depression; in fact, most sleep-studies of men have found wet dreams to be much more rare in the lab than in a person's private bedroom, due to the person feeling a lack of privacy and thus supressing sexual feelings. However if done on a regular basis, this supression can adversely affect a person's sex-life as well as cause great stress overall, as with the supression of any natural appetite or function.

As for the issue of "mess," this is one area which really seems to be designed to shame males into being embarassed about their bodies in a puritanical attempt to keep them from "getting out of control;" the very name "wet dream" seems to compare it to infantile bedwetting, while at the same time claiming that it's a completely non-sexual reaction, even going so far as to claim that it's the body "emptying itself" of semen with no feeling, and is often compared to menstruation in females simply because both happen in puberty, involve the discharge of gametes etc.

However likewise, while the issue of menstruation is discussed openly, with girls being given protection against the "mess," adolescent males are repressed over the much more personal nature of this type of incident, and given no such protection-- when a simple condom functions perfectly well.
This repression causes males to feel naturally ashamed and guilty due to the sexual feelings they experience during this supposedly "unconscious" process which they are told, is simply an unfelt discharge, but which is actually a very intense experience, both physically and emotionally; this silence and sense of exposure -- as well as being related to a loss of bodily functions-- quite naturally results in a sense of shame over what could otherwise be the most pleasurable and satisfying moment of a person's life to date.
Likewise, female sexuality in this area is repressed entirely, which likewise leads to shame over such feelings; however, since female sexuality develops much slower due to lower testosterone levels at this age compared to later in life-- long after most women have become sexual and even had children--it's usually not as traumatic an issue, while likewise female sexuality is often celebrated in our society and media, while male sexuality is treated with revulsion and disgust, causing men to become ashamed of their sexuality rather than proud as most people seem to believe, but is actually compensation for the shame.

As such, it's time that men simply put on codoms befoe bed, just like women do with tampons etc, and both men and women learn and accept taught that somnovolent orgamss are a full-fledged sexual experience, and capable of even greater intensity than real ones, and are NOT some kind of autonomic discharge equivalent to urination/menstruation/etc.

I'd even like to start a group about this, since it's an issue that everyone has, but no one talks about since it's been repressed for so long.

{the posting of email addys on the forums is against posting guidelines, bfl}


[This message has been edited by bfl (edited 08-05-2003).]





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