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Hmm, I wouldn't say that your friends are no good or boring..

I actually feel as though I can relate very well to what you are talking about. I have my moments where I will not talk to anyone (other than those that I live with, i.e. my husband and kids), I won't call any of my family members or friends, and it isn't because they are boring or no good. I simply just don't feel up to it, either because I don't feel like building up the energy to find something to talk about or I am simply just not in the mood to pretend I am interested in anything at the moment. I think I am mostly like this when I am stressed about things in my life, I don't want to talk about the things that stress me out to others, so it is easiest to avoid talking to them.

One of my friends I have known for 16 years, and she knows that this is just how I am. She is never offended by it because it is how she knows me. She and I DID have a conversation about it though (I brought it up, I wanted her to know that it had nothing to do with her). I have another friend who is very clingy and is the type of person that needs to talk to people a lot, extremely extroverted personality and outspoken. She DOES get frustrated with me when I get like this- and she will just keep pushing (instead of slowing down on phone calls, she seems to increase them sounding more and more irritated that I am not calling her back) She has made comments about it, and I have explained to her that it has nothing to do with her and that I just need time to re-energize myself. I feel more refreshed when I am by myself and find that when I am surrounded by too many people I tend to feel as though the life is being sucked out of me (introverted).

Now, I am not trying to imply that what you are dealing with is simply an issue of being introverted, because it sounds like a bit more then that. You said you have been in therapy for years, does that mean you are currently in therapy? If so, is it possible the problems you have been having lately are due to topics you may be discussing in therapy? It seems like a good idea to bring this up to your therapist to figure out if this is due to something you are dealing with internally, or if you have simply outgrown your friends (yea, it can and does happen, although it seems strange that you would outgrow ALL of them, which is why i would tend to believe it is something you are dealing with internally)

As far as what you "should" do...
well, I guess that depends on how much you value these friendships. It might be nice to give them some sort of explanation so they don't think that you are mad at them or something. I wouldn't say you really need to apologize, but you could simply let them know that you are going through a funk at the moment and may need a little more quite time to sort things out- or that you just won't be as available for a while and it is nothing personal. My guess is that if these are real friends they will be understanding and willing to give you what you need without judgement (assuming you tell them what you need, rather then them speculating why their friend seems to have dropped off the face of the earth).





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