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[QUOTE=TryAgain121;3909832]I've always thought "not everyone deserves confidence" in particular those that fail to meet certain evolutionary standards. This is cruel, and perhaps [B][I][U]I am simply confused[/U][/I][/B]. But I've always considered myself to be in that list.

And, as far as this post goes, I say these things not for the reasons you might think. I think I am a monster, I don't have any sympathy for human beings. I am a sick, twisted person. I have macabre thoughts on an almost constant basis.

My family is beyond irritating, and most of the time I seem to deal with them with barely concealed animosity. My family seems to be a conduit into the insight that I lack sympathy, and compassion.

It is a terrifying thing, to realize you really don't care for anyone around you. I have to face myself everyday, have to face the fact that I am bascically worthless and on the inside, am I hideous creature.

I wonder, is there any cure for lack of sympathy and compassion?[/QUOTE]

This is a very abstract post, to begin with. I am not saying you are lying or exxagerating, but I don't see any clear explanation of why you are a horrible, hideous person. What have you done to deserve that label? Of course you aren't such a person, and I might say more, if you won't get offended: you don't really think you are a horrible, hideous person, though at times you may want to believe this. You are just confused and in need of a shover, that is, encouragement.

Since I can't see clearly why you have such a poor opinion of yourself and the universe, I'm tempted to think that you are badly in need of friends, of contact with other human beings, and you have to dismiss the idea that they are necessarily going to harm you. If you keep entertaining these thoughts, then of course you are going to meet only people who work on the same wavelenght. You are a reflection of how you come across to the others.

Please raise from this chair and start doing something about your physical appearance, first of all. Adopt new habits of hygiene, posture, and ways of speaking that will make you more attractive. It's not a question of becoming a model of beauty, but if your physical presence doesn't make people minimally pleased, no wonder you have such a bad opinion about the world at large, your environment in particular.

You may have had the "wrong" upbringing or a birth trauma, but I guess you are an adult now or almost, and this is no excuse for you to swallow that formula and keep complaining. Only you have the power to change.

Therapy may be helpful to you, but it may be costly and it may take a long time before you notice some improvement. So please start working on yourself now. When was the last time you bought new clothes? had a hair cut? exercised yourself? looked at the food you were eating? went to the doctor for a check-up? etc These are all things that you can have control over and are able to do. Unless you are in a prison.

Don't blame other people for your "misery". Yes, I agree that you are basically confused, but you don't need people telling you this. You need to take your life in your own hands and be responsible for it.

I am not telling you to simply put a good face, as if a good face would chase away your bad feelings, though smiling - genuine smiling - could help you somehow. Start practising in the mirror. I am telling you to start working on yourself, first physically, even if you don't have any faith. If you work steadily, you'll soon begin to see some improvements and your self-esteem will grow again.

It isn't easy. You may need to ask for help at certain points (be humble to do so), but once you start, you must not stop.

Write down yourself the guidelines you need to gradually reshape your body and your life. And stick to them.

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