It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Miscarriage & Still Birth Message Board


Miscarriage & Still Birth Board Index


It's a personal decision for everyone. Only you will know what's best for you.

I chose to have a DNC, for my own reasons. I also had a missed miscarriage. The doctor told me that it could be 2 to 4 weeks before my body realized it and started to miscarry. I couldn't handle that. The moment I knew I no longer had a viable fetus, I wanted to end my emotional suffereing and give my body the quickest chance to heal so that we could try again ASAP. I had a DNC the next day. The moment they woke me after the surgery, I bawled like a baby. I had very little pain, felt like I had all the closure I needed. They gave me painkillers that I used only on the first day. I bled off and on for ten days, was back at work and in school two days after the DNC. Two days after the DNC all pregnancy symptons were gone. 28 days after the DNC I got my period.

There are risks associated with a DNC as well, and it costs money. I never want to do it again. But between waiting it out and having a DNC, I thought a DNC looked like the less tramautic option. I wouldn't want to spend four weeks mourning my dead baby and wondering when it would come out.

I've heard horrible stories about natural miscarriages, but my sister-in-law went through one without too much trouble. they opted for it b/c they had no insurance. it took her two weeks to miscarry and she bled for two weeks after but only the first 24 hours were so bad.

Sorry you've had to go through this. I know my husband was my comfort and my strength. He cried as much as I did and missed school and work so he coudl be there with me.
Thanks for the reply. Yeah, it's a crappy deal. I didn't think much about this before it happened, but I never imagined it would be so hard. I can only wonder at what my wife must be going through. She's pretty broken up.

Still, she's having second thoughts about the DnC, which is why i'm asking. We have one planned for a couple days from now, so she's still thinking about it. I think that it would be best to have it done, instead of waiting, but it's totally up to her, so I want to find out as much as I can for her, to help her make the choice she wants.

Thanks again for your feedback... anyone else have any experience?

El.
I am very sorry for you and your wife. My husband and I had to make the same difficult decision just last week. We also opted for the D&C because I could not handle the emotional waiting for the labor. We were 11 weeks. The doctor had told me I could try it on my own, but that it would be difficult due to the size of the baby. My mother in law is a midwife, and she also advised me to consider the D&C. It was not an easy decision. It is now three days later and the physical pain is not as bad as the emotional pain.

You and your wife need to try to do what you think is best for you personally. There is no right or wrong choice - both choices, to say it bluntly, stink.

My heart goes out to you both.
I've had four miscarriages. Three I delivered at home (they were first trimester losses). The third one was I was 17 weeks. They wanted to do a D&E (16 weeks seems quite far along to do a D&C; a D&E requires different medical equipment and is a slightly different procedure). I refused since I wanted to see and hold my baby.

I waited two weeks to go into labor on my own and then requested an induction. I was induced and three hours later delivered my tiny son. I was so grateful to be able to hold and see my baby. We brought him home with us and buried him in the flower bed beneath our bedroom window. It just seemed more respectful than having our baby taken from my womb and having the doctor take care of him.

I had a lot of people tell me to just have the D&E to get it over with (it was agonizing waiting to go into labor) but I knew it wasn't what I had wanted. My baby's soul may have been gone but I spent four months growing that precious little body and I wanted to count his little toes and fingers, see his face and cradle him in my hands.

To me it was worth the wait. He had deteriorated quite a bit but he was my baby. It was even obvious that he looked like my husband :) .

The decision is you and your wife's; make the one you will not regret. I know many who regret not seeing their baby but few who regret holding and seeing them. The OB should be willing to do an induction. So you have more options than the D&E or "wait".

Love and Prayers, Kelly

P.S. It is so difficult. My heart aches for your wife. I'll be praying for you both.





All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:47 PM.





© 2022 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!