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Miscarriage & Still Birth Message Board


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I was wondering if there were anyone out there that opted for a miscarriage on their own as opposed to a D&C. I was 7 weeks pregnant and everything was fine. At 8 weeks and 2 days, i was told there was no heartbeat. The doctor told me my choices were to get a d&c or expel it on my own. I opted to expel it on my own NOT realizing how painful the contractions were going to be. They were 4 minutes apart and lasted a minute long. My husband said that the doctor informed me that some people do go into labor but I didn't remember hearing him say that since I must've been in a fog due to the terrible news. The contractions started at about 3:30 pm and lasted until about 8:45 pm. It was very scary and very painful. We called the doctor who told us that my cervix was opening and getting ready to expel. Afterward, i felt very weak and exhausted! I went to the doctor after it was over and she said that everything was fine and my cervix was now closed. I was relieved cause i didn't want to hear that after all was said and done that not all was emtied from my uterus and that i might still have to go for a D&C. I am now very AFRAID to get pregnant again because I do not want to go through those same contractions that i couldn't handle. MY QUESTION TO EVERYONE is Does anyone know if the contractions of a miscarriage is WORSE then that of a live birth? I guess I am hoping so ..so that I won't be afraid to do this again. :yawn:
I'm so sorry for all that you've been through! My miscarriage at 8 1/2wks was very much like yours. I had regular contractions for 4 hours and even had my water break.

I've had 5 children and 5 miscarriages (currently preg with hopefully baby #6). I believe that live birth is more painful as far as pain goes but it's tolerable since you know you will have your baby in your arms soon. It's a natural process and one that usually ends in joy. The pain of a miscarriage I believe is almost unbearable since you have nothing but an empty womb to show for all of your pain. There is no joy afterwards but extreme emotional pain and emptiness. M/c is also a natural process but life is easier to cope with than death.

I think overall a live birth is far easier and I do NOT have easy deliveries (I have incredibly difficult labors with complications). I believe though that there are women who would say quite the opposite. For some women a m/c is not a major event for them (I know a woman who lost her baby at 5mos. and said "it was no big deal" ; I can't fathom that but that was her perspective).

My heart goes out to you and I can understand your fear. Labor is difficult, very difficult, but you will get through it and if you need them there are a variety of pain meds available. Let us know how things are going if you feel up to it.

Love and Prayers, Kelly

P.S. I've only had one m/c that didn't start with bleeding and cramping. I was 17wks along and there was no heartbeat; it was confirmed by u/s. I was given the option of having a D&E but I refused since I wanted to see and hold my baby. I waited two weeks to go into labor on my own but never did. I requested an induction and the dr agreed. After 3 hours of labor I delivered a tiny baby boy. I'll never regret not having the D&E. We brought him home and buried him in the flower bed beneath our bedroom window (my husband had made a little box and padded it to put him in).

I didn't have the option of D&C with the other m/c because they all started with bleeding/cramping and passed on their own without complication.
with my first pregnancy I miscarried at 7 weeks. I have never experienced so much pain in my life. I went to the er, and they offered a D&C. I declined, the thought scared me, and therefore I opted for it to pass naturally. I was perscribed pain killers and went home. eventually the pain subsibed and passed it on my own. several months later I became pregnant and went to full term. I started with contractions - pretty painful, but more crampy then the sharp pains I felt during the miscarrige. I recieved at epidural (about 12 hours after the contractions started) and pretty much felt little pain after that. I went on to have a c-section due to failure to progress, and now have a perfectly healthy amazing little boy. recently I became pregnant again, at the 12 week ultrasound they found the fetus stopped growing at 6 weeks. I began spotting, then light bleeding with light cramping. My obgyn strongly recommened a D&C. I was extremely scared to take this step - the thought of surgery, anesthesia, hospitals, etc. (petrifying). I thought seriously about having the miscarrige on my own, and thought that perhaps the pain wouldn't be so bad (because I had already had a baby, etc.). But, I was worried because I had already carried around an ended pregnancy for 5-6 weeks, and I thought about infections, etc. therefore I opted for the D&C. while in the waiting room for the surgery I started with the full miscarrige. The pain, again, more severe that I can even explain. I thought I was going to pass out, vomit, etc. My husband said I was as white as ghost and I couldn't stand, move, anything. finally they got me ready for the or, and onto the first round of "cocktails" before the surgery (this was great). I felt dreamy and happy - no pain. then in for the d&c. still dreamy and happy, I layed on the table (no stirrups, uncomfortableness, etc). the had me breath in, and the next thing I know I wake up in recovery - feeling amazing. Not at all sick, or in pain, etc. I wasn't in stirrups or had to be checked, or anything, It was over - just like that. I went home about 1 hour later, I had no cramping, light bleeding, and felt great. So - my opinion, a miscarriage is more painful than labor, and D&C with anesthesia is far better they trying to pass it on your own! Hope this helps somebody.
i have had one m/c last year in april and i did suffer pain it was like severe cramping and i was wondering if this pain was like labor pain. I am pregnant now and getting nervous about delivery i am 32 weeks and posted in the pregnancy board asking about the difference between m/c pain and labor pains. the only thing i knew is that labor last a little longer i guess.

Does all the pain and discomfort of having a child go away right after delivery?





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