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Miscarriage & Still Birth Message Board


Miscarriage & Still Birth Board Index


Thank you for all the love, support and hugs, they are greatly appreciated!!!!

Skyye, I am so sorry you had to go through this too. How are you doing now? Did you decide to try again for a child? If I am being nosy, I am sorry, I just hope you are happy and that things are good with you.

Flutter, I am so sorry for the loss of your Sam, HUGS!!! I will be thinking of you and hope you are doing well. If I would get pregnant again they would do a cervical cerclage where they sew the cervix shut at around 12 weeks. There are still risks with doing the cervclage but right now I dont think it will come to be an option for us, my dh is completely against us getting pregnant again, he said, "Don't you think 7 pregnancies is enough for us to go through. He is very mad about losing another child right now and would do just about anything to not go through that again including him going and getting a vasectomy (He has been way too nervous about having one done that it has been put off for years which led to us having both Shawn and Dylan). I think maybe somehow he thinks if he had, had a vasectomy earlier we could have prevented these losses. I HATE, HATE, the fact that both Shawn and Dylan died I wouldn't go back and not want to have them, because they will always be with me and I know they took a chunk of my heart with them.

I don't know if it is just greiving but I desperately want to get pregnant again, which if I continue to feel this way will become a battle and I don't want that. I love my hubby dearly and I have only been pregnant with his babies (we were high school sweethearts). He wants me to be thankful for our two boys that we have here and I am eternally grateful. But God almighty the desire for a baby is SOOOO strong. I know I am not mentally ready to get pregnant again much less physically my milk finally went away and I'm still bleeding, but my mind is having fun with me all filled baby desires...ugh.

Thank you for sharing your poem, Peace, it is really special and means a lot to me that you shared it. What a beautiful way to honor your baby who I'm sure feels how much you care up in heaven.

ASDGRMama, you have been through so much too!! I am so sorry for all you have had to go through, you have been so strong. I hope I don't bring up bad memories by asking this, but all of your pregnancies have ended in miscarriage? I hope and pray that you are blessed with a child!!! Did they do any testing to find out why things keep happening? I feel like I could just hold you, which would make me cry, but I still want to give you a hug.

I didn't even know it was an option to bring your baby home and bury it yourself. We were given the option of setting up our own private burial or allowing the hospital to bury our baby (different hospital with Shawn and Dylan) in a community plot with other babies that have been lost. I just couldn't imagine not knowing exactly where my babies were and I wanted them to each have their own headstones to let the world know that they were here and that they mattered. There are too many people out there who have never lost a baby who just do not get it, it doesn't matter how old the baby was when it died it was a part of you physically and mentally, and needs to be mourned.

Hugs and love to all of you who have shared your stories and support. I wish you all the best in the future whether it includes more babies or not. I never went to a support group after we lost Shawn but I think I will go to next months meeting because talking with all of you and reading the joy and sorrow that you have shared has helped me so much. Thank you everyone!!!
Susie
I hope you are doing well and I think its great that you are taking time to take care of yourself and health issues. Good luck with all of that.
I too miss the little things that a baby brings and was happy to read your post about that - smelly bottles and adorables cooing. I am not as far removed from it as you as my two are 5 & 3. But it really goes so quickly... And they are just sweet. i am lucky to have 2 incredible little boys and I'm not sure how I would feel after this late miscarriage without them. It was devistating and for those who do not have children yet - I can't imagine how that feels. I'm not sure if I mentioned this already but a neighbor came to tell me her miscarriage stories after she heard about what happened with me. She is older and has 4 children (like 20's-30's). But after her 1st child was born she had 2 late miscarriages due to an incompetant cervix. She went on to have 3 more children with the cervix stitch (i'm not sure of the correct terminology). But I do hope that you continue to be hopeful...

Dawn
I hope that you are ok, I just have tears in my eyes reading your post and would not want to be where you are right now. It has only been 3 weeks since I miscarried at (what I thought was 17 weeks). The baby measured about 14 weeks. Reading your post has me rewinding to 3 weeks ago. I hope you are ok and I'll be thinking of you.
D





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