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Miscarriage & Still Birth Message Board


Miscarriage & Still Birth Board Index


I'm not sure what made me stop here in this particular section...perhaps the memory of similiar feelings when I lost my first born son in 1975. Please let me share what we decided to do with his ashes.

We had visited Michigan's Upper Peninsula many times...and, after much talk, decided this is where we would have loved to take our little red-headed son each summer if he had survived. We drove the 9 hour trip with that little brass urn between us. Finding the perfect place took some time. After taking several sandy lanes thru the beautiful area, we found an old abandoned sawmill...a beautiful clear little pond, a huge pile of sawdust, an old cog-wheeled tractor, beautiful trees and whispering wind...not exactly what I had first pictured when we set out, but the kind of place one would take an 8yr. old. We found an old foundation with a stand of pine trees near, and decided it was the perfect place! We were surprised when we left that the nearest town...about 5 miles away...was called "Paradise"!

Three miscarriages...then 2 live births (daughter is now 29, son is 25!) followed. We usually make the drive at least once a year....sometimes more. My children grew up knowing their brother was now part of that site.

There was a story in the paper about 10 years after Steven's birth/death. It was about a family that was vacationing up there and had taken their kids and an old beloved Irish setter. It exactly described the old sawmill. The old dog ran in and out with the children...exploring everywhere. They felt terrible when that old dog just lay down and quit breathing. The decision was made to continue their vacation and bury him in that beautiful spot. Now...in my imagination, I see a beautiful red dog running along with my little fella.

Thank you for letting me reminisce.........Pam;)





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