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Miscarriage & Still Birth Message Board

Miscarriage & Still Birth Board Index

I'm very sorry to hear about your miscarriage. I myself have had 3 in the last year and a half. I am now 27 1/2 weeks pregnant again. I have 2 children, 2 boys ages 2 and 3. They have made this ordeal much easier for us. After these m/c's I was able to come home to my boys and know that I had two healthy children and to be very grateful. Not everyone is that lucky. I don't know how I would have handled these m/c's had they been my first pregnancy. I agree like you that it seems as though nobody can say the right thing. But I understand the position they are in,especially if they themselves had not been through one. The thing that helps me get through this is to remind myself that although tragic, it could have been much much worse. My current pregnancy is high risk and we go through each day wondering if this child will make it. My mother went full term with her child who died because of a knot in her cord one week before delivery. My misses were all early (7 weeks, 2 weeks, 3 weeks) I do not know how I would survive a full term miss.

Because of this current pregnancy I now realize that there are things that could have been wrong with these babies that would have made these even more horrible. I know that sounds mean, but I am grateful that if there was something so wrong with this child that I had to miscarry it, it was probably for the best. Trisomy 18 and other such defects scare the crap out of me. In the end, you need to remember that you can make it through this, and as you said, you have your daughter. I really do believe that everything happens for a reason. My husband I and have a stronger relationship because of what we have been through together. I just sorry that it took these m/s'c to get it.

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