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Miscarriage & Still Birth Message Board

Miscarriage & Still Birth Board Index

Re: So Sad today
Apr 16, 2007
Hi Pooger,

I know what you mean about being in a trance. I have days like that. I would have been 14 weeks yesterday and now everyone seems to be getting back to their lives and just expecting me to be ok, which for the most part I am. I definately have my moments, and I think anyone who has suffered a miscarriage always will. A psychologist I know told me that I should look at the ultrasound of my 7 week old baby, thank it, and say goodbye (he says to do this because apparently I need to say goodbye to the baby that I lost before I can conceive again!). I thought I was dealing with things ok, until he told me that and everytime I think of what he said I just cry. I try not to think how far along I'd be every monday, but it's so hard not to, especially when I went through and put how many weeks I'd be on my damn calendar. I also have a friend who is now 16 weeks pregnant so every time I see her, which is at least once a week, it reminds me of what I'm not going through now. I hate the fact that I feel like I don't want to see her, because she's one of my best friends and I love her, but I'm just jealous I guess. I haven't had a period since my d&c and I've been told to have one period before TTC again. I know it sounds selfish, but I'm not even interested in sex with my husband until after I have a period because we'll be doing it with protection and it won't possibly create another baby. Aaagh, I never wanted to turn into this kind of person, but I so desperately want another baby, and I want one now!! In saying all that, I do have an amazingly beautiful 3 year old daughter, and I see her playing on her own and I think that's why I really want to give her a brother or sister so she doesn't have to grow up an only child. WOW, that feels good to get that off my chest. Sorry I've rambled so much, but at least it's given you something else to concentrate on. Take care of yourself, and don't be so hard on yourself. You're not alone!

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