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Miscarriage & Still Birth Message Board


Miscarriage & Still Birth Board Index


I'm so unhappy.
Dec 4, 2007
I just need someone to talk to. DH doesn’t understand and I don’t blame him for not understanding. I miscarried at 9 weeks on 9/17 and had a d&c and unfortunately, I have had quite the long recovery. After the d&c, I had continued brown spotting for 2 months and then an ultrasound showed that I had some blood that was just kind of stuck. My doc put me on Provera for 10 days to start a period and flush out what was stuck. Well, the day after my last pill of Provera, I passed the large blood clot and the brown spotting stopped which is great b/c I was really getting frustrated with that. However, I still haven’t started a period after stopping the Provera so that gets me down b/c it’s just a reminder that I’m not back to normal b/c I can’t start a period. I’m going to call my doc about that today though b/c everywhere else I’ve read, women have started a couple days after their last pill and today is the 16th day after my last pill.

Anyways, I’m really an emotional wreck. I cry probably 2-3 times a week. I can’t stop thinking about what happened. I just feel sooooooo heart broken, I mean I really feel a physical pain inside. I feel so betrayed that something was just ripped away from me. And I’m having an especially hard time this week b/c if I were still pregnant, then I would find out tomorrow if my baby was a boy or girl. Every week at some point, I remind myself “If I were pregnant, I would be this far along.” It really just eats me up inside. Some days are great but most days, I’m sad. And I know I feel 10 times worse just b/c my body is still acting up and if I had had a better recovery, I would probably feel some better. I find myself wondering, “What if this happens again? What if I never get pregnant again? What if it takes 10 years to get pregnant again?” My mind just runs with these thoughts and I guess more than anything, I just feel so let down and really I don’t feel any better about this than the day I found out. I’m 23, DH is 24, we’re young and we have time and this pregnancy was unexpected but it doesn’t mean that it was at all unwanted. More than ever now, we want a baby and we’re just waiting now for a cycle to start so we can try again. It’s just hard… has anyone else taken it this hard?





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