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Miscarriage & Still Birth Message Board

Miscarriage & Still Birth Board Index


My heart goes out to you and your familily. YOu must be in a lot of pain and shock. I lost my little angel at 36 weeks after what I thought was a normal pregnancy. He was our first baby. This was in 2005 and my heart still breaks to even think about it. I want to at least give you a little hope and tell you that a year later I conceived again and gave birth to a healthy boy in Aug. 2006. We are about to have his second birthday.

Hope is what got me through my darkest days. Holding on to my goal of having another baby is what motivated me to pull it together eventually. It was a long dark road.

I read a great book called "pregnancy after a loss" Carol Carulli? (sp?) It gave me a lot of hope. Also read, when bad things happen to good people. Support group just made me more depressed but I know it helps many people. ONline support helped tremendously.

My second pregnancy was initially joyful when I knew I had another chance. But it was filled with a lot of anxiety and anticipation. What I did to prepare for it was go directly to high risk specialists and had a consult to find out what they thought went wrong and what the chances were of it happening again. Then I continued to see them with my OB when I became pregnant.
They took good care of me.

Another thing I did to prepare was read all of my medical records from the OBGYN and also hospital. I read over autopsy and pathology reports and researched some of the concerns. I basically armed my self with information.

Finally you need to grieve first and put closure on your first baby. Think of some special things you can do. Are you having a funeral? We had our son cremated and have his ashes with us still. Every year on his anniversary I buy a childrens boquet of flowers and every christmas i buy him a toy that he would have liked for his age. I also keep his little handprint in a frame on a little shelf with all of his baby things.

You will get through this but the pain can be overwhelming. Find supportive people and talk to them often.

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