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Hello again,

Well its been quite some time since I've posted here last! Wow what a trip the last year has been!

I now have 4 kids with the last 1 being a surprise gift!! lol
Another beautiful girl to add 2 our family of 2 boys and 1 girl so now we have 2 of each!!

She just turned 4 months old and is adorable but I have felt like crap for the last 2 months.

To make it easier I will simply list the symptoms I have been having (again!) since I have had my baby. Oh and the funny thing is that my symptoms mostly disappeared while I WAS pregnant.

1) When my baby girl turned 2 months old the bottom of my left foot started buzzing off and on, the only way I could describe it was as if I had a bee stuck under my foot and it was trying to escape. That lasted 3 weeks.

2) Migraines, I have had 5 migraines in the last 3 months when I had only had a migraine twice before in my whole life.

3)Fuzzy left eye, sometimes everything seems dimmer and colors seem duller somehow.

4) Mask face!! I hate this one but have had it for at least 1 yr off and on. It feels like I am wearing a mask at times and my cheeks feel stiff and numb although they are not!!

5) Muscle spasms in the back, lots of back pain!

6) Left arm weakness and achiness, often accompanied by this wierd sensation on upper arm like someone is constantly holding my arm and squeezing. Dont understand that one!

7)Dizzy spells and at times feel as if I had been drinking when I havent, this one is really odd to me because I really will feel almost drunk! It scares me at times.

8) Muscle twitches, in calves, arms, fingers, stomach. seem to be everywhere now.

9) Stinging sensations in fingertips and toe tips, like someone is stabbing me with something sharp.

10) Feel spaced out and sometimes have a hard time trying to keep up with conversations, sometimes pretend I udnerstand when I actually dont. lol not funny but its easier than explaining that my brain doesnt seem to work properly anymore.

11) Feel soooo stupid, cant spell that great anymore. What the hell?? even the simple words, I can stare and stare at my writings and something seems wrong but I cant tell which. Its like I have become stupid somehow and I hate it.

12) Slurring???? Sometimes feel like I have cotton in my mouth or something and I can HEAR myself sounding drunk or something and cant do a darn thing about it except hope that those around me dont suspect I secretly drink!

13) Painful tightness?? Feel like my muscles are tight or something and it hurts to stretch. almost like a guitar with strings that are overtightened. Have that in my big toes, top and bottom, bottoms of both feet, shins (feels like I have shinsplints) knees, back and back of upper arms. I walk funny now sometimes cause it hurts to bend my toes and knees and my shins hurt!

14) Chest sensations! This one scares me but after ecg and chest xrays know its not my heart (thank goodness!). You know when you get startled really bad? and your insides tighten up and feel funny? I get that in my stomach and chest. its like my insides have tightened up into a ball and wont relax but at the same time it feels like its in my ribs somehow, under my ribs. I have a hard time explaining this one.

15) My hairs hurt. I had hair that was down to my waist but cut it last month because my hairs would get really sore and I thought this would help but it hasnt. Now my hair is only down to my shoulders and I do not wear pony tails anymore cause my head has become too sensitive.

16) Internal shaking? Its like all my insides, especially in my chest, are shaking and vibrating. Especially get it bad when I am overtired or hot. Funny thing is sometimes I am visibly shaking but most of the time you cannot even see it on the outside.

17) Insomnia?? I have a horrible time falling asleep but sometimes all I want to do is sleep. Felt exhausted today, took a 3 hour nap and woke up with both arms feeling really heavy and achy and like and overcooked noodle, fat, limp and floppy.

I also get that noodly feeling when I get too hot and is aslmost always accompanied by all over shakiness and weakness.

Have seen a specialist of internal medicine last week and everything is normal. I see my new Dr again tomorrow for a complete checkup and he has also ordered a CT scan which I am still waiting on a call for. He has listed me as urgent for this scan but what does that mean and what is he looking for??

I don't even really know why I am posting this but guess I just need to get it out. I feel so tired and lonely and like a prisoner of my own body, like my body has betrayed me in a way.

I am still undiagnosed but my Dr now knows something is wrong, yeah tell ME about it!
I have been dx and undx with fibromyalgia twice.

Why am I writing this? I dont know, I just want someone to tell me I am not crazy and that I am not alone. I would not wish these problems on anyone but I sure do wish I could talk to someone who understands and knows I am not pretending and especially that I am not crazy or simply LAZY!!

Peace to all, best wishes and thanx for letting me vent.

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