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Multiple Sclerosis Message Board

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well its not a very merry christmas. I'm listening to christmas songs and feling very depressed. This may be long but please give me honest opinion.

Let me begin. I had random symptoms for about a couple of years that I ignored because they seemed normal but weird body things. I remember I started to get concerned when they happened more often than occasionally to be just a normal weird body thing that all people get. It started with fatigue and pain in which I was finally dx with kidney stones. The doc didn't understand where fatigue came from. I remember other occurances in which my fingertips would feel like electric. I had feet and hands fall asleep and thought this normal until the other day I asked and was told they shouldn't be falling asleep unless you are pinching them in some way. I saw random pinpricks of light dancing, usually when in the shower, but sometimes not.

Then oh about 6 or so months ago I would wake up and occasionally had blurry vision, or it felt like my eyes were crossed. I chalked it up to just waking up, and it eventually wore off within half hr or so. I also experienced episodes in which it felt like my bowels would fall out if I did not get to a bathroom ASAP. I hate to be TMI but I'm sure we're all used to TMI when something is wrong. More often than I felt normal, my bowels would come out a little bit as I barely made it to the toilet. I ignored this thinking it was just something I ate, but it started concerning me.

OK so this past week has been hell. It all started with more fatigue. Then I went to the store and got lightheaded and saw dots on people faces and the lights looked like they were moving or something. I had to sit down, as I felt like I was moving. Then one morning a few days later I woke up and could not pee, I had to force it out. I went to ER thinking another stone, and it was not, no infection either. Blood and urine normal. The next day it happened again-full bladder and wouldn't come out. The day after that I was up and down peeing, so when I woke up at 7 am, my bladder was not full and did not have to force. I laid back down and everything from my waist down went tingly and prickly and numbish. I called PCP and wanted to be seen ASAP. Then I noticed I kept dropping things and losing balance. She did some reflex things on me and said I had abnormal brisk reflexes with knees. My legs shot up high and quick and shook when done. I had a positive romberg. She said she gave me a little nudge, but I feel almost completely over into the wall. She should have had someone to catch me but that is another story..... sometimes I have a little flutter somewhere or a hot foot all of a sudden.

I keep trying to redo the romberg at home and I sway and sometimes lose complete balance. Only with eyes closed. I tried heel to toe and was ok with eyes open, but once I closed my eyes I could barely lift my feet without teetering or almost falling over. I keep dropping stuff and losing balance. The latest thing today is I have like 'jerks' or jolts of usually upper body/lip. It doesn't hurt, it is very quick and then sometimes after the jolt my hand curls for a sec. My back hurts. I feel foggy. I was actually thinking I was preg because I had a flutter-braxton hicks-tight feeling in my tummy, ind of made me need to take deep breaths... and the peeing frequently at night thing. But you have to have sex to get preg and that's another story.....

I have a brain MRI on sat and a 3 part spinal MRI on Mon. she got me in quick and seemed upset and mentioned MS. I am scared to death and cannot believe how I fit the symptoms. I have a 3 year old and I'm so scared. The scariest thing is I thought closing my eyes and standing there or doing heel toe should be no big deal and my inability to stand still and balance scares the crap out of me. I keep trying it to convince myself that I am ok.

What are your thoughts?

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