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Cancer: Cervical & Ovarian Message Board

Cancer: Cervical & Ovarian Board Index

Hello, my name is Debbie and this week i was told by my doctor that a large cyst with a solid mass inside it was found on my left ovary. The first time I saw my dr this week he said the cyst was 5 cm and the mass was 3 cm. I kinda figured something was up when I had the ultrasound because the radiologist spent a long time on the left side and was checking my kidney, I knew that wasn't normal so I expected bad news especially when I was quickly called back to my dr for a follow-up. (of course the radiologist doesn't say anything). That day he never mentioned the word cancer or maligancy, but I was expecting the worst. He kept implying cancer by saying it was "suspicious". I had already done alot of research on ovarian cancer before i saw him that day and was familiar with the procedures he mentioned. Even though I was preparing myself for the worst, I still left his office in a fog. I live in small town Canada where waiting lists to see specialists and surgeries can be a long wait - some even up to several months, of which he told me I would probably have to wait at least a month for the procedure let alone the app with the gyn. He told me on this visit he was glad it was caught early and mentioned how the cyst was actually quite small. He referred me to a gyn and I am lucky to get in on the 15th.
I saw him again today as I needed a dr note for work and had many questions. He started off by saying that the surgery (not procedure) will probably take place the week following my app with the specialist. He had mentioned in the first visit a lacroposy (sp?) and today talked about a laporatomy (sp?). I had lots of questions as I'm almost certain its cancer and has spread as I have many of the symptoms for spreading (severe gas pain and cramps - especially at night, freq urination, lower back pain, tenderness over the liver) although the ultrasound showed a normal rt ovary and a normal left kidney. When I mentioned my concerns about spreading he said there was no signs of fluid in my abdomen (sp?) he called this ascites, and that that was a good sign of no spreading and that the ultrasound was good at detecting that. He also tried to reassure me that the other symptoms are probably other problems. He's really easy to talk to and I don't think i'd be as comfortable at asking questions with other drs in my community, I was actually feeling okay with everything. At the end of the appointment I asked for a copy of my reports (just so I could have the tech terms to look up on the internet for more info) he said sure and then seemed to hesitate to give me a copy of the ultrasound report. He put it at the bottom of the pile and quite frankly his behaviour concerned me. When I got back to my office and quickly checked to see if he'd given it to me I was totally shocked to find out what it said. He had mislead me on the size - the cyst is actually 8cm not 5cm and the report clearly states that this cyst with tumor is more likely cancer than not. I was devastated. I had read on the internet that less than 6 cm was an encouraging sign now, am more worried than ever that it's a later stage and most likely spread because of its size. I know for a fact he told me 5 cm on the first visit as he showed me how large that was on his ruler and I right away thought 5cm = 2 inches. I'm totally devastated and feel betrayed. How can I trust what he says now? I felt like calling him on it - but what would that prove - I'm sure he'd just say I was mistaken. I really don't think he even told me what was on the report. He could at least have been more honest. I understand that drs don't want to give their patients a panic attack in their office but really where's the trust. I really think he wants to stay the "nice" guy and leave it to the specialist to break the bad news.
At this point, I just hope I'm wrong about the spreading and/or staging.
If its cancer I want to be prepared to tackle whatever the future throws at me and I would appreciate any advice, website links, or articles. I am especially interested in finding out from others their secrets for dealing with ovarian cancer both mentally, physically and spiritually.
Sorry about the long post, I just wanted to share my feelings with people who would understand - thanks for listening.

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