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Panic Disorders Message Board

Panic Disorders Board Index

Re: WhyWhy Why
Mar 23, 2007
Believe it or not, I think this is a textbook case of anxiety. Everything you say here is extremely common. I read a lot of message boards and literature about anxiety and I have seen people who are mirror images of you.

Some panic sufferers are very uptight people, perfectionists with no self-confidence. With these people it is easy to see how they ended up with anxiety disorders. However some people are as laid back as can be. That's how I was. Hell I was the [I]opposite[/I] of a perfectionist; I was so relaxed all the time that I was almost lazy, and I wasn't afraid of anything. Then one day I had a panic attack. Out of nowhere, suddenly, and I had no idea what it was. I just thought I was dying.

You struck a chord when you asked if your daughter's impending wedding could be subconsciously causing your panic attacks. Yes, it very well could. My panic attacks started after a rash of huge things happened in my life- I got engaged, my dad and sisters were almost killed in a car accident, Hurricane Katrina happened and I went to Louisiana to help, and I became a vegetarian. None of the changes phased me at their exact times, so the stress started to come out in the form of panic.

It is VERY common for anxiety sufferers to wish they just had a simple physical problem that could be fixed and they could move on with their lives. Occassionally something physical is the problem, but unfortunately sitting around wishing for that will only make it worse.

It is VERY common for people who are otherwise very confident and laid-back to be unable to find triggers for their panic attacks. They triggers ARE there, you just have to look harder for them.

There are other meds for you to try besides Xanax. And if no medication is making any difference, do not forget that there are other things. Therapy, reiki, yoga, breathing and relaxation exercises. In fact, in my personal opinion therapy is a much more effective treatment than meds because it actually fixes the problem, rather than masking it. I recommend seeing a counselor or psychologist who could get to the bottom of this in addition to your psychiatrist or primary care doctor.

I asked why a lot too. I still do. I spent the majority of my engagement and first year of marriage miserable and constantly in a state of irrational terror. Why be so sad during what are supposed to be the best years of my life? But asking why gets us nowhere. It's a natural feeling but not a proactive approach. Sometimes I will sit in my car and just cry and scream at the heavens, begging God to make me understand what I did to deserve this. But when I get it out of my system, I go inside, I calm down, and I muster up the bravery to keep living my life and doing everything I can to get better.

You are NOT doomed, it is possible to control panic attacks. However do not sit around thinking they will go away by theirselves, or that a pill will permanently stop them. You are being faced with a new problem and you will be a new (and better) person once you defeat it...but YOU have to defeat it. You are responsible for your own mental health. There are tons of things to try, get out there and start trying them. Get your life back so you can enjoy it!

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