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Parenting Issues Message Board


Parenting Issues Board Index


hi
i have an almost 4 year old and she has done some of the things you have described. the best advice i can give you is to set up some rules and stick to them. her behavior will get worse before it gets better. right now she knows that if she whines or carries on she'll win out in the end and get what she wants. i've seen it with mine. it may take you putting up a gate (i did that in the beginning to break my daughter from coming over to our room and climbing into bed with us every night - i put it so she could still get up and use her bathroom but she couldn't get to our room) - or just taking her back to her room in the middle of the night when she comes over.

tell her if she acts up or throws a tantrum when you are, say, at the park with her friends or at her friends house or at the mall - wherever - that you will take her home and then actually follow thru and do it. chances are she will catch on when you do it - maybe after a few times - but what she wants most is to prob stay and play and not go home.

maybe set up some kind of reward system or something where if she behaves and is good throughout the day she can earn something she loves to do - like play with playdough or watching a short movie or special one-on-one time with you - whatever she would value most.

it can be a tough age but we can get thru it!! hang in there! if you stick to your rules and follow thru she'll learn that she can't push your buttons. my husband keeps telling me to get a handle on our daughter now cause when she gets older i'll be in big trouble if i don't!! good luck.
[QUOTE=esam]hi
i have an almost 4 year old and she has done some of the things you have described. the best advice i can give you is to set up some rules and stick to them. her behavior will get worse before it gets better. right now she knows that if she whines or carries on she'll win out in the end and get what she wants. i've seen it with mine. it may take you putting up a gate (i did that in the beginning to break my daughter from coming over to our room and climbing into bed with us every night - i put it so she could still get up and use her bathroom but she couldn't get to our room) - or just taking her back to her room in the middle of the night when she comes over.

tell her if she acts up or throws a tantrum when you are, say, at the park with her friends or at her friends house or at the mall - wherever - that you will take her home and then actually follow thru and do it. chances are she will catch on when you do it - maybe after a few times - but what she wants most is to prob stay and play and not go home.

maybe set up some kind of reward system or something where if she behaves and is good throughout the day she can earn something she loves to do - like play with playdough or watching a short movie or special one-on-one time with you - whatever she would value most.

it can be a tough age but we can get thru it!! hang in there! if you stick to your rules and follow thru she'll learn that she can't push your buttons. my husband keeps telling me to get a handle on our daughter now cause when she gets older i'll be in big trouble if i don't!! good luck.[/QUOTE]

HI
thank you so much for your advice.
You gave me some good ideas to think about.
Yes, it is a tough age.
Do you think that girls act up at that age more than
boys, or does it just depend on the personality?
thanks again





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