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Parenting Issues Message Board


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Desert,
Your really going to have your hands full in another 5 months. I can see why its so overwhelming for you. For one being pregnant really takes a toll. Are you going to home school your oldest daughter? If so maybe you could find a play group for her so she can see how other kids her own age act. My son is a little monster (lol) just a figure of speach. But seriously he throws tantrums and screams when hes at home. But he can go to school and everyone tell me how great he his behavior has been. Its only been like that for the past 8 months. At his other school I was getting phone calls at least once a week asking me to come get him. If it wasn't a phone call I was getting a letter (every day) from his speech teacher or regular teacher telling me how defiant Caleb was. He has an older brother but of course his brother was "too big" to play with him. This year he's had a really great teacher. He does eveything she tells him to do. Sometimes he might start to say BUT and she's like Cab (that's her name for him) and he says "OK Wilson" and does what she tells him too. Its really frustrating at times. BUt if there a subsitute teacher you better forget it because Caleb will not listen to her. One subsitute actually had to call me one day because Caleb was just being so rotten at school. Everytime she told him to do something he said "NO!" She said Caleb would you like to go outside "No was his responce." Caleb its time to go in "no again". So after going through this until like 1:30 in the afternoon she took his Hulk action figure from him. Of course he was mad. She told him "Caleb Hulk has to go to time out until the both of you are doing what is told". (Caleb likes to talk for his action figures). She took hulk away and Caleb told her "I'm going to tell my mommy on you." She told him ok go ahead. She called me and let me know what was going on. (Caleb doen't stay mad for long so I told her he probably wouldn't even mention it when he got home.) Sure enough not one word about it. Anyway! I think that since your pregnant and dad doesn't mind taking your oldest daughter for a while maybe you should see if dad will watch the baby too so you can get away for a while. Even if its only for a hours so you can go to a resturant and get a meal and sit by yourself or call a friend to meet you. If you don't your going to get overstressed and its not good for you or the kids. I was lucky that Caleb went to school for 3 hours a day monday-friday when I was pregnant with my daughter. I used this time to go grocery shopping, my doctor appointments (I let them know that either I come in the morning or I was bringing my son they scheduled morning appointments), me and my best friend would go to lunch at least once a week. Or best of all I would catch a nap. You really need sometime to yourself right now. If husband is home let him know ok on Wednesday or (whatever) day of the week it will be your night to feed the girls so I can take a walk or whatevr you want to do for an hour. Don't feel bad because he worked all day he helped to make your children too. My kids are 9,6, and 2 1/2. I don't always get a day for myself like I used to because of husbands hours but soon the oldest will be back in school and my daughter will start taking naps again. I will be able to read a book or talk to a friend while she's still sleeping. My husband and I decided when Caleb was almost 2 that I would stay at home with the kids instead of working until he went to school. He was going to a baby sitters and we just thought at that time maybe he wasn't getting the right attention he needed therefore that's why he wasn't acting his age. Well we were wrong. We found out about a year later after going to doctor after doctor trying to get thing done that he has a learning disability. Well we kinda slipped up and I got pregnant with my daughter a couple of years earlier then planned. So now I'm home with them until she starts Kindergarden. I don't regret it at all. With my oldest so I missed alot because I was going to school. With Caleb I missed alot because I had to work. (my oldest 2 boys are from a previous relationship) My husband and I have been together since Caleb was 8 months old. I believe the hardest job you will ever have is being a parent. I'm thankful that I got to see everything my daughter has done. I've been there for her first words and first steps. Somethin I missed with the oldest two. My step-dad tells me just to take it one day at a time and while I'm taking care of the kids to make sure to take care of myself. Once your oldest daughter makes friends she will more then likely just ignore the way and not even care anymore if she's on the floor or not. Do you have anyone who can help you besides for your husband? Maybe you can do a trade off with a friend. I used to do this also when I was pregant. I would watch my friends kids while her and her husband went to dinner and she would watch mine while I caught up on my sleep. My husband was deployed so he wasn't 2 much help at this time. I love him anyway LOL. We moved back closer to where my mom lives about 15 months ago. I thought wow now the kids will get to see their nana and aunts and mom will get a little break once in a while since husband works from 4:30 a.m. to about 8:30-9:00 p.m. at night 6 to 7 days a week. Big joke on my part. Husband doesn't want the kids to stay with anyone but my mom and sometimes they can go with one of my sisters. But in April my mom moved 2 1/2 hours away and my sister started working 2 jobs ao half the time especially since its summer I wind up with her son who by the way is a teenager. I'm not looking forward to those years. It like there 2 year olds all over again. Well i wish you the best of luck. Your doing a good job being a mother so you just need to remember that. And don't worry about what others think when your daughter screams their not the one who have to deal with her you are.





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