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Parenting Issues Message Board


Parenting Issues Board Index


Fallen....it's good of you to want to know what parent's think...in the long run we are only thinking about how much we love you and what we can do to best guide you so that you will have a great life. At the time you may think we're doing the complete opposite...ruining your life as my 16 year old often says. A friend of mine says that all she thinks is, "I just have to keep them alive until they're 21!!!" Can you imagine the pressure a parent has when they're thinking that way????

We gave birth to you & promised to keep you safe and to give you the best in life. It's really not an easy job....and the teenage years are really the hardest. And the world is full of really dangerous things....drugs, violence, date rape, some things that we never encountered when we were teens but that we have the job to protect you from. These days you could be at a party & someone slips a drug in your drink & takes you off only to rape you. So when you're out late....your mom wants to be sure you get home safe which means she waits up and won't go to sleep until she hears you come in and knows you are safe. That's the mind of a mom.

When I was a teen...I hung out with others smoking pot, drinking etc. but for some reason I didn't. I don't know the reason why....I guess if I were to guess it would have to do with the way my mom raised me. She was stricter than other mothers always wanting to know where I was, who I was with and wanted me home much earlier than some of my friends. I didn't like it at the time....but was thankful for it when I didn't end up pregnant like some of my friends, didn't end up missing out on college like some did because they chose to party in high school rather than keeping their grades up.

So Fallen....it may seem like your mom is messing with your life way more than you'd like her too...but she does so only because she cares. These are the impressionable years....if she weren't on the sidelines pulling you in and guiding you onto the right path of life....you might be there smoking, having sex, doing drugs like the others only because you didn't have a mother bold enough to mess with your life when it needed messin' with ;)
I'll leave you with one final thought...you asked if it's possible for a mom & daughter to be friends. The answer is yes...a friend gives you advice and tells you like it is and sets boundaries when needed...you may not like it at the time but as you mature and time goes by and you eventually have your own family, you will come to realize (as I did) that she is the best friend you ever had!!! That's what gets me through these teenage years....knowing that my girls will feel the same way one day......Goody :wave:





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