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Parenting Issues Message Board

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I have been going through this as well with my 10 year old son, for the past 2 years. I blamed it on my ex husband for the first year as I believed it was HIS fault that our son kept forgetting things. Why is it that he never forgets to take things over there but always forgets to bring things back? Because as a parent I assumed the responsibility to make sure my son was prepared, whereas my ex did not seem to care. Bad parenting skills I say -- I have asked him time and time again to remind our son to do a "last check" before he leaves to come home, to ensure that he has everything. My son got an earful too but all that resulted out of my blaming was now they both lie and say the item was lost instead of forgotten.

What I ended up having to do was discipline BOTH of them. When an item was forgotten I would phone my ex and make him look for it and drive all the way back here to drop it off. I figured if I inconvenienced him enough then he would try harder to do the last check thing for the next visit. If the item is "lost" (or in other words he is too lazy to look and bring it back) then my son loses something of importance until the item is returned.

Maybe I'm too harsh, but I think this is a discipline problem and nothing more.

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