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Parenting Issues Message Board


Parenting Issues Board Index


Re: Favoritism...
May 3, 2005
I have the same issue... my parents never had much money, and still don't, but it's little things that get to me. My brother is 19 and still living at home. It made me so angry to see the things he got away with and never got in trouble for. He's an adult now and they still bail him out at every turn. I was always expected to suffer the consequences of my irresponsibility. I moved out at 19 because I couldn't stand the tight leash my parents were still trying to keep me on. Even though I was expected to be financially independent and responsible for my own actions, I was fighting them to be able to go out and do what I wanted. He lives there and has it made. There was a big blow up over this a couple years ago. It's kind of embarrassing to admit, because I was like, 23 at the time and had my first child. I had moved back in with my parents because my DH had left with the Air Force and I needed the help with my newborn. But I ALWAYS contributed financially when I lived there. As long as I had a job, I was buying groceries and taking care of my own needs, and helping pay the bills. My brother doesn't do any of that. He comes and goes as he pleases and doesn't give them any money for bills unless they ask for it, and then he complains about it, so they don't even ask much anymore. He will also pull all this irresponsible crap like blowing all his money from his job, then not having enough money for gas to get to work. So my parents give him gas money. ????? That makes me SO angry because they would've told me to deal with it. That it was my own fault. So I finally brought it up one night and we had a big argument about it.

On the upside, my brother is self centered and irresponsible because of all this. I on the other hand, like the other posters have mentioned, have a good head on my shoulders and am taking care of my family and finances and keeping a great relationship with my DH 1000 miles from home. I don't need material stuff to be happy, and we get by on what we have. I guess I've just come to look at it as a blessing that they were so much tougher on me because it's made me the responsible adult I am today.





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