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Personality Disorder Message Board

Personality Disorder Board Index

i'm 15..and new to this board. but i'm pretty sure i have a personality disorder but i'm not sure which one i have. any advice would be appreciated. thanks.

why i think i have a personality disorder:

- Identity Disturbence (i have unstable self-image & sense of self, and when i was younger i wanted to be a boy. i mean i wore boy clothes, had a boy haircut, walked around the house shirtless, etc. and on my christmas list i always put "to be a boy". i dont know if thats normal or not)

- Low Self-Esteem (i pretty much just hate myself)

- I Self-Injure. (i cut, scratch, & bruise). i SI to feel pain, to get out emotions(mainly anger), to punish myself(for being so stupid, worthless, etc.), and cause i like the way it looks(almost like a sort of art, i see beauty)

- I always feel empty inside.

- I am almost always bored.

- I can only feel three feelings at one time. emptiness is constant, it never goes away. and with it, i either feel angry and annoyed, or hyper and excited, etc.

- I have a bad memory

- When i was younger i had "magical thinking"

- I am a bit paranoid at times. when i walk alone in a public place i always think people are staring at me, and talking about me. (but this could be from 7-8 years of being teased/picked on)

- I've always had an anger problem. i use to slam my bedroom door over and over to calm myself down or hit my hand on my bedroom door. now i self-injure to calm down.

- My mood changes a lot. for example, i will be very bored and tired and then a bit later i will be hyper and excited. or i will be calm and content then my mom will talk to me or touch me and i will get angry.

- I don't like being touched or giving hugs. i will only allow being touched by my friends or my boyfriend. if anyone else touches me i will get angry. i dont really know why/how this started either.

- I think i am too skinny(cause i was born premature) but its weird cause i wont eat unless my stomach growls or i get dizzy. Or sometimes i will forget to eat.

...i dont know if any of these are symptoms of one personality disorder or anything..maybe i am just driving myself crazy?

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