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Personality Disorder Message Board

Personality Disorder Board Index

Hi, alot of you know me and my story. I have ptsd, bpd, depression, recovering from an ed, night terrors, panic and anxiety disorder. Wow- am I full of a great mix.

Well, lately some things have not been going well for me at all. I am on klonopin (2years now) and lexapro ( 2 months now). At first, the lexapro with the klonopin was AWESOME, I felt like never before in my life but it seems to not be working at all and maybe even putting worse things and thought in my head.

Has anyone ever been where I am - with these meds? LExapro? Well, I have researched on the web where some people after a month or 2 start having "real, real, bad thoughts in there head" Well, I am having them. And even though I don't want to do anything BAD to me- I have been doing something to help ease my emotional pain. I am not sure if I can say it but there is another board that pertains to it, I think you probably can guess what I have been doing to my arms~~~

Does anyone else hurt themselves? I have read that it is common with bpd but the last week is the first time I have done it in years and I cannot seem to stop, I mean, I AM NOT TRYING TO PERMENTLY HURT MYSELF, but just numb my mental pain. But, what I have done, will be noticible forever.3

I am really scared, scared because I feel so good after. Please help me- I am scared to tell anyone because I told my sister who is my best friend and I always tell her everything and she is all I have in life to talk to and she totally told me I now disgust her and she will not talk to me.

Scared, confused, and SO VERY ALONE

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