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Hi Nakita,

Boy! Sure sounds like you were busy in that kitchen, huh? I'll bet everyone had a full, happy tummy after that feast! :) Those pooches sure did catch you by surprise, didn't they?! LOL Well, if you're going to be a grandma to a bunch of puppies, that's the way to go! ;) If you're anything like me, you'll have a hard time giving the pups up when the time comes.

I agree with Rose's suggestion if you're trying to blow the interview. If they push for the night shift, then you can tell them there's a transportation issue since you cannot drive at night, especially that distance. I'll keep my fingers crossed that this or something similar works to your advantage.

I'm really happy to hear that you had such an enjoyable weekend. You were certainly overdue for one. That's great that Joe's doing better, too. That in itself must bring huge relief to you and Larry.

I've been trying to keep my mind as occupied as possible, yet I am still depressed and heartbroken. So many emotions are running through me...anger, heartache, bewilderment, worry, disappointment, desperation, resentment, hurt. I really thought that I would receive some sort of response to my letter and there has been nothing at all. He was online last night & didn't IM or email me. After he signed off, his friend signed on...I thought maybe he would IM me (he has in the past) but he didn't either. At least not so far.

My head tells me I have done everything I possibly can to show this man that I love him and care about him with all my heart. My heart keeps screaming don't give up, don't let go. Yet I am so tired. Maybe he's incapable of love and caring, I don't know. I do know that I can no longer continue to make excuses for him or his behavior. I've been as understanding & supportive as I possibly can. I do not feel there has been any devotion to our relationship from his end...I guess the swift change in his attitude towards us has me confused. Only days earlier, he'd surprised me with my favorite gooey brownies. I don't know what to make of any of this. Other than that it is cruel and hurtful and undeserved.

Well, I'd better get some work done here today. I'll check in this afternoon and this evening to see what's new with you girls. Hope you're both having a great Monday! (Yeah, right - a great 'Monday'...I AM dillusional!) ;)


Since Jon is my husband's sister's son, she doesn't consider him MY nephew. But I do and so does he. And with what I've told you about my husband's family, they need someone intelligent enough and outgoing enough to be able to ask the medical staff questions and understand the answers. Boy! If I ever felt dumb, all I'd need to do is hang out around these people. LOL! The doctor told my SIL no over-the-counter meds for Jon, and he's coughing, so she sends her boyfriend-to-be out to get cough drops for Jon. I'm assuming that cough drops are over-the-counter meds, and I said NO! Let him cough up all that phlem in his lungs. The cough drops would suppress the coughing, and the fluid would stay in his lungs, then TA DA Pneumonia! Just what he needs :confused: If his doctor wanted him on a cough suppresant, then he would have prescribed one.

My SIL and Jon are both trying to hide Jon's bloody nose tissues from me also. Nose bleeds are a common side effect of Chemo, and the doctor needs to know that he has them. I don't know why they are hiding them from me. They are afraid that when I make my daily check in calls with the Chemo nurse that Jon will have to go back to the hospital. The nurse said nose bleeds are fine as long as there is not a lot of blood. My SIL is also supposed to be taking his temperature every 4 hours and anything over 100.5 needs to be reported. I write down EVERYTHING, temp, blood pressure, when I gave his infusion, chest sounds (I have a stethoscope). I make daily calls to the Chemo nurse's voice mail to report each day's stats. Sticking her head in the sand will NOT keep him from getting worse. Kids on Chemo are SUPPOSED to get worse. They are SUPPOSED to have tummy aches, bloody noses, coughs, weakness, etc... She also gives him all the candy he can eat.

She decided, on her own, that since he won't eat anything but popsicles and cottage cheese and candy that he needed more nutrition. I agree, but she's now giving him ADULT Ensure three times a day. Once a day is fine, but he needs to EAT foods, not drink them. Too much protein will cause his kidneys to work harder, and he's high risk for kidney failure. I'm having trouble convincing my SIL of this.

I'm tired and frustrated. I feel like I'm talking to a three year old, and she's 45! I don't want him back in the hospital either, but I also don't want him to have unnecessary complications. Now she has the propane and electric heaters on in the living room (she's moved a bed downstairs to the living room), and it's horribly hot in there. She's babying him way too much. He's not too weak to climb the stairs to go to the bathroom, but she got one of those potty chairs for him to use in the living room. He's not getting any exercise. The doctor said for him to get outside and walk, try to do normal 10 year old activities. He refuses to do ANY of his school work, and his teachers have made it very easy on him with the work they have assigned. All he wants to do is play is new playstation 2 and gamecube and watch the cartoon network. He's actually saying that he should be spoiled because he has cancer. It doesn't help any that all of her kids are extremely spoiled and lazy BEFORE this cancer diagnosis. Jon yells at me when it's time for his infusion and for me to check his vitals...but I tell him I will not allow him to talk to me like that.

I also told him that I will be spending my birthday (Nov 3) in the hospital with him, NOT going out to dinner with my parents and shopping afterwards like I usually do. MY choice to be with him, because I love him and want to take care of him.

His two sisters refuse to wear the protective face masks around Jon. The 14 y/o is still on antibiotics and the 18 y/o coughs all the time from smoking too much. I have printed signs that I placed on my SIL's from door stating NO SMOKING, Must wear face mask, Must wash hands with anti-bacterial soap, before entering. Does anyone do this? NO! My SIL doesn't even make Jon wash his hands after using the bathroom, or should I say potty chair and urinal? :eek: UGH!!! I could just SCREAM!!!!

Now there's cock roaches all over her house, she leaves food out on the table from YESTERDAY'S meals, doesn't wash dishes everyday....AND lets the food she has cooked today sit out and collect bacteria! I've tried and tried and tried till I'm blue in the face to explain the dangers of this practice.

They DID finally get rid of all but two dogs, gave them to the humane society who actually found homes for them. One dog that they wanted to keep, a cute Chihuahua covered in fleas, was wanted by an older couple up the street from us. This dog is extremely friendly and I was afraid that he would tear out Jon's IV line. I finally convinced my SIL that the DOG would be much happier with the couple. She finally gave the dog to the couple, who took the dog to the vet, got it fixed, de-flead (is that a word?) and updated it's boosters. The dog is happy, the couple is happy, and I hope there will be no more fleas in Jon's bed!

I could go on and on for many more paragraphs, but I don't want to whine too much... Ok I do...get it off my chest....LOL!

I wish I could just move Jon in here with us, if we had the room which we don't, and be done with it.

The 14 y/o is soooo full of attitude that I just want to smack her every time she opens her mouth. Larry WON'T keep her again next time we go for a five day chemo treatment. Larry finally told me that the last time she didn't come home from school and he was calling everywhere looking for her, that he had severe chest pains from anxiety. I can't risk my husband's health. Someone else will have to keep her. Have I mentioned that she locked Larry in the house, with a padlock, for 2 1/2 hours one day? The house could have caught on fire!!! The dogs were in the house and needed to go out. She took the phone with her, so he couldn't call for help. AND he's too big to climb out the tiny windows in this house. He was so furious he didn't even say anything to her. MY SIL asked why he didn't spank her when she finally unlocked the door. He said that if he started to spank her, he wouldn't have been able to stop. The same with lecturing her... so he did nothing. But suffer more anxiety. Larry was hospitalized a few years ago for anxiety and chest pains, and being a big man, he's at risk for a heart attack. He won't go to the doctor, man thing, because we can't afford it. I'd rather owe the doctor for the rest of my life than have anything happen to him.

Larry DID say that he would keep her IF we could duct tape her mouth shut and put leg shackles on her so she couldn't leave. He would also want a location device installed so he would know where she was at all times. If ever a kid was oppositional-defiant, this one is it!

AND her crush on a 40 year old man is being reciprocated. Gross and disgusting!!! This 'man' told her that he would wait until she was 18 so they cuold be together. My SIL knows this, but does NOTHING! She doesn't want to anger her daughter. EVERYONE in my town knows that they are seeing each other. This girl has spent many hours, many times, alone with this man in his apartment. And you know how in a small town, that people talk....I want a restraining order against him to stay away from her. I want her phone taken away. This man bought her a $90 cell phone AND pays the plan for her so she can call him whenever she wants, which is ALL the time. If only she were MY daughter.....she'd get over her broken heart crush, and he would be investigated for child molestation.

Ok, enough whining for now... Thanks for listening...uh reading...

Write again later.

By the way, my REAL name is LauraLee, Nakita and Kya are my dog's names, along with Sebastian. My cats are named Dmitri, Sascha, and Tatiana. Two hamsters: snowflake and butters, and a betta fish I call Alpha.


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