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Personality Disorder Message Board

Personality Disorder Board Index

I would NOT take advice from somebody that is borderline.

You need to realize that what you know and accept it. It is incredibly disrespectful to do what he is doing. Who cares if it is characteristic of his disorder. He made you into one of his parents. He expects that he can be psychological abusive and viscious and then come back to an open arms and loving mothering figure. No, don't do that to yourself!!

It is time to scout out for other men. Make yourself a list of expectations that you want in your men and keep it with you. Empathy is so important, since you have already been through a hellish predicament. A guy who says "I never get angry" is passive aggressive usually, so be careful. A guy who is overtly haughty, arrogant, and snide is most likely narcissistic. Keep away! Keep your eyes open for smiles, guys who are OK with talking about their feelings and thoughts, guys who can talk about plenty of topics, guys who ask you questions, guys who have common interests as you, etc. Get your make up on, a new outfit, new shoes, new hair style, and brush up your social skills and go out and have fun.

I have read many books on personality disorders, verbal self defense, and other psychology books and none of them can prepare you enough for the viscious, lying, deceptive, manipulative, bossy, and arrogant nature of somebody with a PD. Although the books (especially object relations) help in many ways, like becoming alert when one is near you, learning about what makes them tick, and defending yourself whenever he/she becomes abusive out of the blue, etc. Still when they unleash their mind games onto you it will be an uncomfortable and even terrible situation.

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