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Personality Disorder Message Board


Personality Disorder Board Index


Waratah,

I really had to chuckle at your description of what you'd like to do with my book recommendations. It's funny how we all relate to different things in different ways. The reason I loved those books so much is because they had a sort of "I've been there...you're not alone" kind of feel to them. In my opinion they were written with a more personal feel to them. I'm not into all the clinical psyco-babble...I prefer a more intimate, human approach to things. I guess that's the beauty of us "crazies." We're crazy in our own unique ways! LOL

As far as whether or not BPD is inherited, I believe that the predisposition, like Sunka said, may be there, but that it may just be due to the environment the children are raised in. Neither of my parents are Borderline, though my father is an alcoholic and my mother has had bouts of depression and impulsive behaviors due to her inability to cope with certain emotional issues. I truly believe that BPD is more of a "circumstancial" disorder, meaning that it manifests as a set of survival tools when a person is faced with "traumas" (not only abuse though) that they don't know how to deal with. Each of us is wired with our own individual set of abilities and strengths, as well as weaknesses and we deal with things in the way that works for us at the time, whether it's healthy or not in the end. I believe that although negative in many cases, my coping skills are what saved my life after a traumatic and abusive childhood.

Just my two & a half cents here though...I'm interested in differing opinions. I have A LOT to say on this subject and could go on for hours. ;)
Hi Lynae76 and all on this thread, (so soorry this is a long long post)

[B][I][COLOR="black"] "I guess that's the beauty of us "crazies." We're crazy in our own unique ways!" LOL . . . . . :D[/COLOR][/I][/B]


[COLOR="blue"]Ohhh, my goodness, it's so nice to hear the voice of another self-confessed "BPD crazy" and with a generous dose of sardonic humour . . . . . too too funny :D:) Geezzz, this really gave me a well earned laugh this afternoon - a BIG THANK YOU - I really needed it today. ;)[/COLOR]

[B][I]"As far as whether or not BPD is inherited,Neither of my parents are Borderline, though my father is an alcoholic and my mother has had bouts of depression and impulsive behaviors due to her inability to cope with certain emotional issues." [/I][/B]

[COLOR="blue"]I agree with your sentiment of BPD being something that can be developed due to environment, but differ in opinion with you over the biological pre-disposition because I see the biological 'genes' component being of greater influence than environment alone. This doesn't discount environmental factors altogether, but makes these "dependent" on the presence of genes for their frutition. I don't mean to be rude or insulting at all, but do feel that the behaviour exhibited by your parents is part of the "spectrum" of emotional disorders that are all too ill-defined, or conversely, so over defined, that the mere mention of it (e.g. depression) and everyone seemingly nods and knows exactly what you intended. Of course, as we now know, depression differs by type, duration, disability and all sorts of co-existing labels such as MDD, dysphoria, Bi-polar, Uni-polar etc. With or without delerium, dissociation, anxiety, panic etc. etc. And possibly so to BPD![/COLOR]

[COLOR="blue"]I also feel similarly about the BPD label, there are so many variations on the theme that to categorise every individual presentation would be unworkable, but that there is a "spectrum" or "matrice" of criteria relevant to BPD, but this need not necessarily be prescriptive of the presence or absence of BPD. The label, in my current view, could only really be considered by a psychiatrist in concert with a well known patient who exhibits BPD behaviour, thinking and emotional dysregulation over a period of time.[/COLOR]

[COLOR="blue"]The point is this. That at some time in nearly everyone's life, they're going to get angry, yell at someone, say insulting things without regard for the hurt, act in ways that are detrimental to their own well being, and cry out loud if they so choose to do so. So, perhaps this is the point where BPD and the so called 'normo's' separate company. The normo's quicly return to the usual paterns of acceptable behaviour, but those with BPD, or BPD tendencies, find it extremely difficult [I](impossible?)[/I] to shut down their over active nervous systems, and thus the extreme behaviour and thinking continues. What we see in BPD then, is the outward manifestation of internal anxiety. AND this is the part I believe [I](just a personal opinion)[/I] that has strong biological foundations rather than environmental or socially learned cues. [/COLOR]


[B][I]"Each of us is wired with our own individual set of abilities and strengths, as well as weaknesses and we deal with things in the way that works for us at the time, whether it's healthy or not in the end." [/I][/B]

[COLOR="blue"]I completely agree with you here, I also believe that BPD's are doing the best they can at any given point in time to meet their needs in ways they know how. This is why it is so pointless goal setting setting with BPD's. When they're in a meltdown, they do not have very much control over what they do or say.[/COLOR]

[COLOR="Blue"]I have also felt the heavy hand of unhinged mild psychosis where very strong "p . . .d" and "s . . . .d" ideations will not subside and then dominate my existence constraining social functioning. Last year I was totally 'non-compus-mentus" - I had absolutely no idea where I was, who I was, didn't recognise familiar people, places, couldn't walk straight, or even make a cup of tea. It was just horrible, and at the time I didn't have the thinking or language skills to explain how I was feeling. It was really really frightening to be feeling so disonnected from reality, and not be able to express myself.

Very very frightening to lose cognitive executive function . . . . especially for me! Anyway last big episode was late 2007, and just recently felt myself sliding into the abys again, and running out of options with my psychologist and lovely new GP, found myself returning to the 'lady shrink'. Now I'm functioning again, not brilliantly mind you, but at least I'm functiioning.[/COLOR]


[COLOR="Magenta"]Opps, completely off topic again. Somebody [COLOR="DarkOrange"]slap me [/COLOR]on the wrist - quickly! :)[/COLOR]

[COLOR="blue"]The biology: I recently discovered that my estranged mother and 3 of her 4 siblings have all been hospitalised at some stage in their lives for mental health issues, and their Dx was Borderline Personality. My mother was also assessed for 'schizophrenia', but turned out to be 'schitzotypal or schotzoid' - gosh I can't recall now. Anyway the point is that there is a positive family history for mental health issues on both sides of my family. Fathers side is depression, mothers side 'personality'. So it is no wonder that when I do go downhill, I swim like a rock - free falling straight to the bottom usually -, without any prospect of self recovery. So, I again reach out to medical people I barely know and ask for their assistance. . . . . . . . but sometimes it can take quite a while before I reallise I'm in really really bad shape. [/COLOR]

[B][I]"I believe that although negative in many cases, my coping skills are what saved my life after a traumatic and abusive childhood." [/I][/B]

[COLOR="blue"]Yeahh! Isn't this interesting! I'm really really glad that your coping skills saved your life too. I could really identify with your statement here. Like you, I also had an [B][I]"unconventional childhood"[/I][/B] (that's my new expression (lol . . .) for all the things you mentioned earlier + some more), but also feel that I've been incredibly lucky too, because many people who've been through what you and I have, are living lives of absolute chaos and desolation as a result. [/COLOR]

[COLOR="blue"]I've discussed this common outcome briefly with another lady freind whose been through the 'unconventional childhood' too, (she's a psych nurse) and her story is so so familiar also. She has minor meltdowns from time to time, has a lovely husband, 3 great kids etc etc. . . .but from time to time just begins to go downhill. Her strategy is to be very very kind to herself when she begins to feel overwhellmed, takes things slowly, her hubby understands the history of abuse too. I don't know if there is a biological link in her family, but I do vaguely recall her saying the mum was quite ill for most of her childhood years.[/COLOR]

[COLOR="Blue"]So, are we products of our biological destiny at conecption?
Or, are we what society and environment make us to be?
Or, possibly some combination of the two, with the more powerful influence providing greater weight? [I]hmmmmmm . . . . . .????[/[/I]COLOR]

[B][I]Just my two & a half cents here though...I'm interested in differing opinions. I have A LOT to say on this subject and could go on for hours. ;)[/QUOTE][/I][/B]

[COLOR="Blue"][COLOR="Blue"]"[I]Yeah - please talk away all you like because talking about BPD is very interesting for mee tooo!"[/I]
Its' just so so good to talk about these things with other like minded self-confessed crazies too. . . . lol. . . . . .:D:):jester:[/COLOR][/COLOR]

[COLOR="Blue"]Regards to all, and keep well as best you can, share your views on BPD and get on the boards when you're feeling _______________. (insert your favourite here)[/COLOR]

Best wishes, waratah :D





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