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[QUOTE=Dena Doo]Hello Kayla,
I am not one to judge by far. I have made numerous mistakes in my life. It's a very difficult decision and I know you just want to go back into time and erase it, but drinking makes you do stupid things. I just have a feeling that if you were not drunk, you would never in a million years have done that. I know where you're coming from. Do this step by step..get a home pregnancy test than contains [B](2) kits, not one. If the first one reads negative, you will feel releived, but, still take another one three days later. Do the same if it reads positive. Those tests are not 100%. If it is neg twice, no worries, no feelings are hurt, no friendships will end (and I know you won't drink anymore around his friend) and most importantly a marriage will not come to a possible end. Also, no cheap-o-depo preg tests. Now if the results come back positive, make an appointment with your doctor. If you don't want him to know either, seek a new one in a nearby city/town/whatever. If the doc says you are preg, then that's when you have to decide whether or not to say you are preg for him and that's it, or tell him it's possible that it is for someone else which would be his best friend. I am not being ugly, but I was in a similar situation and didn't take the time to do the step by step deal, and the decision I made was by far, the worse decision I have ever made in my life. I acted like it didn't happen at all, no proof, no puddin. And the only person that I hurt the most was myself. And that was the summer of 1997 and I am still dealing with those horrible issues. I feel that you are so desparate at this point, that you might make a desparate (wrong) decision; that is why I told you this. Kayla, life is too short to spend your time worrying about what if's. Do the right thing and take your time, and see if you are or you're not. You said that your guy is jealous....are you apt for a longtime relationship with a guy who is jealous or are you apt to maybe just splitting? I'm just making suggestions here, please, I don't mean to offend you. I want you to know that I raised my son alone (on a single income) for 8 years. I was 3 mos preg when I got married and I left my ex (he had baby issues) before my son reached his 1st birthday. Maybe I'm going way off base here, I'm a newbie, but not in this particular situation. Staying with someone who is jealous is a choice, but there are other choices. My son is 15 now. Great kid. Wouldn't trade him for all the tea in China, even though I had to go through it without his bio father and IT WAS ROUGH. But we have made it. I'm so sorry, but I have a problem with jealousy. You're okay....you're just a bit frazzed. Also, about you knowing your boyfriend, is he the FATHER FIGURE or not?
Please don't take any offense to any of this. I wish you well. And drowning yourself in "what ifs" is not good for YOUR health. Take care.
P-E-A-C-E,
Dena[/QUOTE]
Thank you so much for your time and response. It really meant a lot to me. I am tired of wondering what ifs too it would be so much relief not being pregnant. If I am though I will be happy also. My boyfriend is a wonderful man (hes a bit older than me hes 21 , I am just eighteen)He has a steady job and loves the idea of being a father when I had a scare in July when the doctor told me I was pregnant he broke down and cried when we got in the parking lot and he rubs my belly every night knowing that I am not pregnant telling me he wants a baby so bad. I really hope I can have one for him and it would be great if this one was his. I believe he wants to be a father because hes never really had anything in his life that didn't get taken from him and his own father died when he was three. I have no doubt in my mind that he would be a wonderful father he is great with kids. you are a very strong women for raising a child as a single mother. My father couldn't do it as a single father so I am sure it was tough on you. I am thinking perhaps I should tell him before the baby is born (if I am pg)because I could not live my life with that big of a lie I couldn't do it to my kid or my boyfriend it would be secret that I just couldn't keep. I hope that if I am pregnant and his best friend hears of it maybe he will confess because he could I am sure add up the dates and it could very well be his. But I thank you again for your response and time:D
Kayla





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