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Relationship Health Message Board

Relationship Health Board Index

My boyfriend is from the UK and I met him last year while I was doing my Erasmus (I'm from Croatia) and it’s been great ever since. We videocall a lot and text all the time but we’ve only been able to actually see each other twice in one year because I went to see him, raising money from one week jobs. I live with my parents and I am looking for a job as I’ve just finished my degree but I really miss him and want to see him really bad after coming back a month ago.

Though this is not a problem for me, he’s really overweight (nearly obese) and that stops him from getting on a plane to see me and that’s why I had to be the one going there twice. I really miss him now and would love to see him again but I can’t afford going there again and I haven’t been able to find a job there to be able to move. He suggested he’d pay for me going this time but as he’s still in education and doesn’t have a job either, I feel bad about it and makes me feel guilty and uncomfortable. :(
But my mother is even starting to question his feelings for me because he doesn’t seem to be putting effort into coming here and I always have to be the one “making the effort” to make it work… And since I just got back, I can’t really ask to go there again so soon. I really don’t know what to do at this point and it really hurts… as I also feel guilty for not accepting because he sees it as me not wanting to go and see him and becomes really upset and doesn't understand why I don't.
I don’t want to pressure him to lose weight, because his body issues really affect him emotionally and I want to be supportive as he wants to lose weight but I don't know how to deal with this situation anymore :(

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