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Relationship Health Message Board


Relationship Health Board Index


Been with my boyfriend for about 2 1/2 months and he doesn't see eye to eye with me on a lot of things. Sometimes he doesn't stick to his word and most situations it's in his control so he definitely could if he wanted to. Like last night, he told me he was going to take a nap and would contact me when he woke up. He contacted me after he had been up for some time. Said he had cleaned his kitchen, got some beer to drink and that he was taking time for himself. Why couldn't he have told me that he would contact me in a bit if he wanted personal time? The other day he picked up his friend (doesn't have a car) at his on again, off again girlfriend's house and my boyfriend had told me he wouldn't pick him up at her house again, so he didn't stick to what he said. He said he wouldn't do it again but I'm not sure if I should believe him. His friend and her have a toxic relationship and I wish my boyfriend would stop trying to "rescue" him when his friend chooses to go back to her. It's mind games.

He says he doesn't want to be on his phone non stop around his friends and roommates because he wants to focus on them but yet when we are together, any time someone contacts him he responds right away, it is not fair. You should show the same respect to me. I told him I wanted to work on being on my phone less while we are hanging out together. I was trying to have a conversation with him and I had to stop talking so he could answer a text message, even though I told him it can wait. He never seems to understand why I get upset and he always thinks he's right on these matters. I've tried to talk to him about it a few times. If he's on his phone while we are talking again, I'm just going to walk away and take some space. I deserve to be treated more than a second class citizen. And he always has "reasons" for why he cant always respond to me when we are not together, yet those reasons never apply to anyone he responds to while we are together.


"Reasons":
-music is playing
-checks phone throughout day
-focusing on those around him
-I have 3 roommates now. When I first hung out at his house he had 4 roommates and he talked to me very often and responded instantly.
-Didnt get notifcation that you texted me
-Didnt hear phone going off
-didnt see text message notification on screen. Call me if you want to talk.

Also, another issue is how he gets annoyed when I ask who is at his house. I'm usually just curious and he thinks I should just know who comes over because usually the same people come over and I should "just assume" what kind of people come over and he thinks it's an invasion of privacy and that I should trust him.

The other night I got upset because he didn't text me when he got home from work, like he always does. His excuse was cause his friends were there, including a guy I've never met or heard of. I asked who he was and he was cracking jokes because he didn't like the way I reacted to him not texting. After some time he told me who he was. What can I do to resolve these differences?





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