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Hi everyone

I'll try to keep this from being too long. Ok basically i have been with my boyfriend for 4 years (today infact). For the past 4 years my boyfriend has always talked to people on the internet, about sex and stuff. This has broke my heart so many times i cant remember how many. he lied about it all the time but i would always find out. I read a conversation once, and he was saying i didn't matter to him and could he go round to this other owmans house for sex etc...it devastated me and has ever since.

This however isn't the problem i have right now. We seemes to have worked all that out. For the last 3 weeks or so i am pretty confident he hasn't been doing anything like it as we sorted it out.

We lived together in a big city in England for a year, he finished the last year of his degree there, and i was on my first year in University. He then finished and got ajob back home, so i gave up that university and moved to one closer to home. We found a house togetherbut after 3/4 months the company he worked for broke down and he had to look for another job. So i moved to where my University is, in a shared house with 3 girls and one man, whos 40 odd and never ever here. So he moved back in with his parents and has just recently got a job 250 miles away from me.

I was a little upset at first, mainly because there has been so much hurt for me over the last couple of years, but i love him and i have stuck with our relationship and it just seems like everything is finally becoming better. So i got used to the fact we wouldnt see each other so much etc...and i was very very pleased he has got the job hes always wanted.

So hes been looking at one bedroomed flats for himself, which are quite expensive....but still...

Anyway today he phones one of the personnell ladies at his new cmpany to ask about which areas to move to etc, and the comany have suggested that him and the other new person starting work there should move in together. This other person happens to be a young female, who has a degree in the same subject as him..

So obviously i kinda went nuts, and amd here now...crying my eyes out because he is even considering it. I know in some ways i am being unfair and i should trust him, but how can i? i have been hurt so much before. I was just getting used to trusting him about the internet thing. I dont know what to think.

I dont think he would actually cheat on me. Its all the other things i am gettng so upset about. Like him watching tv with another girl, or having dinner together or just being with another girl all the time...she will be the only person he knows in the city, and likewise for her...it just hurts so bad to think i am so far away, sat on my own...waiting...

he thinks i am being totally unreasonable and cant understand why i cant just trust him. I just want to have a home with him so badly, it really hurts to think hes gonna set up home with someone else.

I dont know wether i should go with my feelings and be adamant that i dont want him to do this, or just let it happen and be miserable. He said we may aswell end the relationship if i cant handle it. I think hes being totally selfish and isn't considering my feelings at all.

I would just like some input...do you think i am over reacting, should i be more understanding? or should he not do it?

I am so confused by my feelings, its hard to think straight. I am shaking and crying all the time. It probably sounds to other people that we shouldnt be together. I often wonder why i didn't dump him when i read all the stuff on the net...but i love him so much. i believe everything he says, and all the promises hes made over the last few years. I just cant help but think i'll be setting myself up just to be hurt all over again.

please help.





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