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Relationship Health Message Board

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hey jhart,

I first broke up with my boyfriend because there were complications outside of our relationship. I don't want to go too detailed into it, but basically, it's serious stuff that we can't control. He told me that he still wanted to be with me but he also had to deal with the other issue in his life. It's not that there's another girl or anything, but it's serious enough for me to want to break up with him because I don't see how we can be together if he is going through some sort of crisis outside of our relationship.

Then, I realized that I was being an unsupportive girlfriend and even kind of cold-hearted, so I decided to get back together with him. Then, his crisis became an obstacle in our relationship again. I became all insecure that things just won't work out, so I thought about ending things again. I guess he realized that things won't work out between us, too, so he ended the relationship this time. So, technically, he dumped me. He told me to give him time, but I didn't want to wait, because why should I? No smart girl would wait, right?? To him, it was probably a break. A break in the relationship until things clear up. To me, it was a break up. I'm NOT going to wait!

So, I tried my best to distance myself. As soon as he ended our relationship, I thought I'd never speak to him again. Wrong!!! He called me two days later to just talk. Then, he called me again a week later. Then, everything just started all over again! I tried so hard to distance us, but he somehow always find some way to get back into my life.

There are times when I go without speaking to him for months! but as soon as he gets a chance again, he'd come right back in.

I just don't know what to think anymore. Things are so complicated.

We act like friends now, but I still care about him. And I think he still cares about me, too.

The funny thing is that technically, he ended the relationship, but it almost seems like I dumped him, because he seems to want us to be part of each other's lives still, while I don't. Does this make any sense at all?

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