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Relationship Health Message Board

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[QUOTE=jhart999]Yeah, I've definitely got to relax and enjoy getting to know new girls instead of worrying about getting a girlfriend per se. That's essentially the crux of my situation - I'm putting to much pressure on myself to find someone to start another relationship with. I suppose I can't help it since I've never "dated" people because my ex and I got together when we were both only 17 and before that time I shied away. Don't get me wrong - I love meeting new people and hearing about their lives (it amazes me how a complete stranger can influence another person so powerfully sometimes). But sometimes I get that feeling that I want to be with somebody who knows me inside-out and is totally relaxed and happy that I know them that well, too. I guess that someone will come along soon enough and for now I should have some fun looking for them. It's really exciting actually. All I need now is for the weekend to come :([/QUOTE]

I know exactly where you are coming from.....I, too, enjoy the comfort that comes from being with someone for a while. But, you are exactly right!! You are kind of putting the cart before the horse so to speak. You do not develop that closeness and comfort level right off the bat! And trust me...there are some people you don't WANT to be that close with!! :D

You said it are putting too much pressure on yourself. But what you may not realize is that the same pressure is being exuded BY you, onto the girls that you meet. Often this is what people are actually referring to when they dub someone "desperate." You have to be able to curb that appetite for "girlfriend" and instead learn to be ok with just having a good time!! Like you, I dated someone (ducking b/c everyone is going to kick me for this!!) from the time I was 14 until I went off to college. And it took me a while to LEARN how to just "date." But boy, once I got the hang of sure was FUN!!!! :bouncing:

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