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[QUOTE=Serendipity24]I just wanted to clear up a couple of things.





This is not the case with me. I have a boyfriend that I have been with for almost 2 years, and that I live with. He is the only person that I would get ever derive "comfort" from out of knowing he had romantic feelings for me. I would NEVER DREAM of using any kind of feelings that my friend had for me SEVEN years ago to my advantage. I'm a decent person. I know that you weren't necessarily saying that I'm that way, but just in case you were thinking I was, I wanted to clear that up.
And IF it is the case that she's upset because he had feelings for me in the past, that is a ridiculous reason to have stop talking to me. That was SEVEN years ago, and if she is that insecure, then she probably should not be getting married.



I understand that change is a part of life, but that does not make this any easier. I feel like I'm losing more than my best friend, I feel like I'm losing a part of my family. I feel as if this is one of my brothers, and it's tearing me apart. If this is something that inevitably I will have to accept, I will. I just don't want to walk away without attempting anything for fear that I will always wonder what would have happened had I said something.

I have 2 older brothers, and I can honestly say that if one of them was with someone who tried to dictate who they could or couldn't talk to regardless of the the sex of that person, I would say something to them simply because in my mind that is controlling behavior, and I don't want to see someone I care about with someone controlling.

And for those of you who say that it is inappropriate for you to spend time with your friends after you get married because they are of the opposite sex, I can not believe that you can somehow justify that. If you truly love a person enough to get married to them, then you should trust them with friends, EVEN if they are of the opposite sex, and vice versa. It's not a matter of a commitment level, it's a matter of trust.

Sorry if I stepped on some toes here, but I am stunned that some of you think that he should have to sacrifice his friendship with me as a sign of his commitment to his fiance.

Serendipity[/QUOTE]


You may be losing a friend and that is hard to deal with...especially someone that close. But you have to remember that relationships/marriages work best is there is good team work between both spouses. He loves his wife dearly and I am sure he feels the same about you. He is beginning a new life now with a female partner and at the beginning stages of making a family of his own.

His friendship with you will be cherish in his memories for ever, but now he has to move on and make the commitment with his wife. I am sure he is not doing this to hurt you but he has to chose between family and you....And in most cases it is a hard decision but Family it out rule in most cases.

I can understand if the wife may not want him to hang out with you alone but why doesn't she allow it when he is home? When marriage settles in the rules should apply for both spouses so he may not like her out with another guy.





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