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Relationship Health Message Board


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[QUOTE=GirlHarley]SOPHIA....how old are you again? and where do you live that you are not meeting any men?

I'm finding it hard to believe YOU are finding a hard time meeting men, you sound (from your post) attractive, smart, and witty...Do you have any interests or hobbies? Are you willing try new things in life?[/QUOTE]

Hey Girlharley! Thanks for the encouraging words :) . I'm almost 32 and, ironically, live in a huge city in the east coast. Most my friends and family don't understand why I'm still single. I don't know either. Just never seem to meet guys who have the same values as me; they all just want to have "fun" and are not ready. Basically they just all want to screw around. ALL of the guys I was in a relationship with, or so i thought, were this way. I dated my ex fiance for over four years, and he wasn't ready either even though he was a lot older than me, so finally I left. So it's not like I'm pressuring someone into being "serious" too soon. Yes, I have interests: I love movies, books, hiking, used to take yoga, etc. I don't think I have any fewer interests or hobbies than the average woman who managed to find a mate. I'm at a loss :rolleyes:
[QUOTE=Blizzard45]This is interesting because I'm a single guy and I can relate to where you're at right now.

My perspective is it seems like the in the city I live in the ratio of men to women is like 50:1. It's like all the women are in hiding. The only women who ever leave the house are ones with husbands and boyfriends. I guess the rest of em go straight to work and come straight back home.

It's not impossible for me to get a date but from my point of view I can understand why attractive single women have some problems. Alot of them have like a thousand mile stare. They don't even make eye contact with you. Even when I'm feeling extra confident I don't feel like trying with women like that. And alot of them just don't have much to say while average looking women will usually talk your leg off if you let them. Or they get all judgemental. Like you have to choose every word and expression very carefully because they'll bolt at the smallest slip.

I'm not saying your like that and I don't necessarily fault women who are. But, I think it helps anybody whose in the hunt to work on being friendly and approachable. Believe it or not even a shallow guy like myself finds that attractive. People like that are just funner to be around. I can understand why some women would fall into the trap where they think their looks are the only thing they have going for them but it's really not true.[/QUOTE]

Hey, maybe we should switch cities! LOL. In my city, the ratio is very unfavorable to women. I am laughing very hard at the "thousand mile stare" because I have used the same expression with regarding to men who live in my city. They just seem to be so wrapped up in their own world, they don't even notice women anymore. I am not bad looking, but I've seen women on the subway or on the street sometimes who look like models, and no guy would even look in their direction. They're too busy with their cellphones, having that "must die working 70 hours a week" expression. So, as you see, it goes both ways. I know that some women seem unapproachable as well and I completely understand why a man would be reluctant striking a conversation with her, even if she were pretty. In short, i have no clue what the solution is. That's why I'm going back to grad school. Nothing like meeting someone at school! I'm kidding, of course, that's not the real reason. But on a more serious note, if I were married and could have a child right now, I would happily not go to grad school. I just sort of gave up. Figured, you can't have love, and a family, at least I'll be a highly educated, high salary earning childless woman in her late 30s. Beats being a broke childless woman in her late 30s, right?





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