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Here is another story to back up both Honeychild & Madskillzgal two different views as I see both your sides and agree with both of you.

I have had the pleasure of seeing both sides of the green grass.

I was married for 5 years to know that there was a grass greener. My ex was a good husband but bored the crap out of me. He did not abuse me, he was a sweet guy and still is.
BUT, when we got married he changed, people say you should see the person for who they are before marrying them. Well, for me I did see a wonderful guy, he was always there For ME, I was a spoiled girl by him, I did know wrong by him, but when we married that full of life guy disappeard and became a boring couch patotoe. When I asked him to do things he would snap at me to stop changing him. I had to make all the social plans, if I wanted to try different things in life (as he did before we were married) he didn't want to join me. He did not stop me from being me but I felt he was stopping US from being a couple. I was also young and somehow smart enough to know I was bored, he wasn't going to change, but I was changing. OH, I had also known him for 3yrs before even dating him, dated him for another 3 years and married him for 5 years. Divorced at 28 with a child.

That was 14 yrs ago. In those 14 yrs...I dated alot, dated some young hot guys, some older guys, and had some serious relationships. Some ended bad,some just ended because they did nothing for me, and some ended because I did nothing for them. I don't have any regrets except to say I did things my way. I had alone time, boring times, great times, sad times, and even scary times. I had doubts that I would never meet someone for me.
I came to accept my life as a single mother / a choice I decided to make for myself. NO more losers for me, I'll settle to be by myself on my terms.
That GRASS did become Greener for me.

My bestfriend, has been married for 20 years. I have watched her make all the effort into her marriage. Her husband doesn't put any effort into their marriage. She has not intentions of divorcing him, she will stay in her marriage and work on it all by herself. SHE knows the grass isn't greener on the other side, thanks to watching my life and always being there for me.
I love her for not judging me with decisions that I have made in my life and she loves me for not judging her for her decisions that she has made.

Being divorced and single I get to see both sides of the grass, I get to see wonderful marriages last, the efforts that make a marriage work. and I get to see single woman who want those marriages and can learn from the married couples. Married couples can see/view what single life is like through divorced singles and know that or make a choice if they want that for themselves. There is a happy medium to both sides to this.

Don't judge a single divorced happy woman for her choices. If she is happy that is all that matters regardless on how many partners she chooses or says she wants. She is entilted because she is SINGLE not married.
And single divorced woman or man should not judge why husbands & wifes stay in marriages they choose to make it work because that is what they do want and are commited to making it work.

We have choices. We can have the grass green on both sides.
We, ALL want to be happy and fullfilled in life. If marriage makes that happen for you great!
For the ones that want to be single YES, you can still be happy and fullfilled in life...To me, the grass is always green on either side because I have had the pleasure of seeing both sides. I admire those marriages who have weathered the storm to keep the sparks flaming and working together to honor their vows of commitment. It takes two to make a marriage work.
For being single, I too admire men and woman who are at peace with themselves because this takes only one person to achieve and that is yourself.

:wave:
[QUOTE=GirlHarley]Here is another story to back up both Honeychild & Madskillzgal two different views as I see both your sides and agree with both of you.

I have had the pleasure of seeing both sides of the green grass.

I was married for 5 years to know that there was a grass greener. My ex was a good husband but bored the crap out of me. He did not abuse me, he was a sweet guy and still is.
BUT, when we got married he changed, people say you should see the person for who they are before marrying them. Well, for me I did see a wonderful guy, he was always there For ME, I was a spoiled girl by him, I did know wrong by him, but when we married that full of life guy disappeard and became a boring couch patotoe. When I asked him to do things he would snap at me to stop changing him. I had to make all the social plans, if I wanted to try different things in life (as he did before we were married) he didn't want to join me. He did not stop me from being me but I felt he was stopping US from being a couple. I was also young and somehow smart enough to know I was bored, he wasn't going to change, but I was changing. OH, I had also known him for 3yrs before even dating him, dated him for another 3 years and married him for 5 years. Divorced at 28 with a child.

That was 14 yrs ago. In those 14 yrs...I dated alot, dated some young hot guys, some older guys, and had some serious relationships. Some ended bad,some just ended because they did nothing for me, and some ended because I did nothing for them. I don't have any regrets except to say I did things my way. I had alone time, boring times, great times, sad times, and even scary times. I had doubts that I would never meet someone for me.
I came to accept my life as a single mother / a choice I decided to make for myself. NO more losers for me, I'll settle to be by myself on my terms.
That GRASS did become Greener for me.

My bestfriend, has been married for 20 years. I have watched her make all the effort into her marriage. Her husband doesn't put any effort into their marriage. She has not intentions of divorcing him, she will stay in her marriage and work on it all by herself. SHE knows the grass isn't greener on the other side, thanks to watching my life and always being there for me.
I love her for not judging me with decisions that I have made in my life and she loves me for not judging her for her decisions that she has made.

Being divorced and single I get to see both sides of the grass, I get to see wonderful marriages last, the efforts that make a marriage work. and I get to see single woman who want those marriages and can learn from the married couples. Married couples can see/view what single life is like through divorced singles and know that or make a choice if they want that for themselves. There is a happy medium to both sides to this.

Don't judge a single divorced happy woman for her choices. If she is happy that is all that matters regardless on how many partners she chooses or says she wants. She is entilted because she is SINGLE not married.
And single divorced woman or man should not judge why husbands & wifes stay in marriages they choose to make it work because that is what they do want and are commited to making it work.

We have choices. We can have the grass green on both sides.
We, ALL want to be happy and fullfilled in life. If marriage makes that happen for you great!
For the ones that want to be single YES, you can still be happy and fullfilled in life...To me, the grass is always green on either side because I have had the pleasure of seeing both sides. I admire those marriages who have weathered the storm to keep the sparks flaming and working together to honor their vows of commitment. It takes two to make a marriage work.
For being single, I too admire men and woman who are at peace with themselves because this takes only one person to achieve and that is yourself.

:wave:[/QUOTE]

What an excellent post!!!! Thank you for sharing your life experiences!!! :bouncing:





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