It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Relationship Health Message Board


Relationship Health Board Index


first, lemme make it known, that the break-up was spurred by me cheating on her... here's a makeshift time-line...

June 2002
we meet... we get close...

July 2002
we've begun dating...

August 2002 - January 2003
everything is going great... she's the greatest woman i've ever met...

January 2003
i cheated on her... i'm not sure why... i think it might've been the act of doing something i know was wrong (i deserve the death penalty for that, i know)... i even started formulating a lie to try to soften the blow (i started to, but i couldn't go thru with it)... she informed me that she had wanted to marry me until that happened...

February 2003
we come to an understanding... i explained to her that my feelings for her never changed, even if it's hard to believe... she said we would take a couple weeks apart so she can think, and then she'll let me know if she thinks she can try to work things out with me...

February 2003
she agrees that our relationship is worth trying to recover...

March 2003 - July 2003
we live together... we're a couple again... romance... serenity... confidence... comfort... we seemed to get closer than ever... more comfortable with our feelings and our bodies...

July 2003
she asks for time away from me again... during this time she develops a crush on this guy (who was completely wrong for her), and she informs me a friendship is all i can have from her... there was a lot of back'n'forthing on that issue... i didn't know if i could do that, while being in luv with her... i don't think it would've been healthy...

August 2003
she realizes she doesn't like her crush @ all, and we live together again... she'll be moving 5 hours away September 1st, and she wants to make the most of our last month together...

September 1st, 2003
hugs/kisses/tears/luv-drunk ramblings ensue as we say our goodbyes...

September 2003
a few weeks into September, i go to visit her in her new town and new home... it's like we're a couple... romantic dinner... romantic nature walk... sunset kisses... bed-sharing... luv-making... hugs/kisses/tears/luv-drunk ramblings recommence b4 we part... i thought that in no time i'd be moving downstate to join her... (i was wrong)...

October 2003
limited contact via phone/e-mail as she's adjusting to her new town, getting into the swing of school/work...

November 2003
we have an argument over the phone (about getting back together as a couple, we apparently weren't on the same page @ all)... we have nearly no contact what-so-ever starting then...

December 2003 - June 2004
very very limited contact... she would occasionally answer the annual e-mails i would send her, begging for a chance to talk to her... she denied me that, telling me that we've been over it b4 (which is semi-true)...

July 2004
she is now currently back here in town... she's been here for almost a week... she has made no effort what-so-ever to contact me since she's been here... she's staying with a friend, maybe 10-15 minutes away... several ppl have informed me that they've seen her... yet she doesn't even stop by, call, e-mail, nothing... she never even let me know she was coming here...

now, this whole time i've been apart from her, it's been hell... i still think about her every single day, even tho she's not really even in my life anymore... i miss her with everything i'm made of and more... i haven't made luv to or gone out with a woman since her, in September 2003... and to my knowledge, she hasn't been with anyone either...

i just don't understand... she said she'd try to work things out, and things went incredibly well after that... i wouldn't dream of hurting her like that again, not ever... yet she was apparently driven to the point where she had to cut contact with me... to the point where she wont even stop by to express concern for my well-being in her first trip back here since she moved...

i don't understand how it goes from falling in luv, to me cheating, to forgiving, to falling in luv again, to her getting a week-long crush on someone else, to getting back together with me, to crying and showing such emotion when she moved, to me seeing her in her new town and things seeming like we were in heaven, to an argument over the phone, to her having nothing to do with me, to her being 15 minutes away from me as i type this, and i can't even see her...

like i said, i still think about her everyday... i don't even mean to... if i conciously make an effort to not think about her, then i wind up dreaming about her (seriously)... really really depressing, morbid, self-isolating dreams about her that leave me shook up for weeks...

what am i supposed to do here? i can't get her to talk to me, and i can't get her off my mind... i suppose i deserve this (and worse) for cheating on her and starting to lie to her about it in the first place, but i truly changed after that... i never realized how important a person could be to me...

so how was your day tho? :(





All times are GMT -7. The time now is 04:21 PM.





© 2020 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!