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Relationship Health Message Board

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[QUOTE=elatedgiraffe]UGH!! The constant lying is awful. Of course you can't beleive anything she says now. Shes a queen at lying and now you are supposed to beleive and trust what she says? You know, my ex boyfriend told me he was "planning" to tell me...he had five months to tell me before I found out through someone else. You are right about the having her cake and eating it too. For me and after being cheated on..honesty and loyalty are the biggies for me that I MUST have from a partner. I know how you feel. When my ex boyfriend cheated on me I tried for close to 2 years trying to get over the cheating. He was very remorseful, BUT no matter what technique I tried or how much time I gave it--I NEVER EVER could trust him and that was ultimately why we eventually broke up. I realized I couldn't spend my life checking e-mails and questioning his whereabouts. I know all too much the thoughts that go through your head when she tells you, "oh, you are crazy..I wouldn't be with anyone else"..and then you call and she doesn't answer and you immediately start thinking shes with someone else. You sound like a good guy who deserves a good girl. Why don't you save your time and energy for someone who respects you? Someone who is loyal and trusting? Someone who does not lie? If you figure out a way to forgive and honestly forget then you let me know because as far as I'm concerned one can't. Cheating is the ultimate way to destroy a relationship...for good.[/QUOTE]

yeah that sucks. You find someone you like to be with, you think you are working things out, and staying away from each other for a bit will help. Then she tells a bunch of lies. Since you like her a lot, you want to talk yourself into trusting her, but in your heart you will probably never be able to do it. She will be going on a girls night to a club, and you will be in your bed not being able to sleep, cause you have no idea what she is doing, and if she is doing something you won't find out from her. I have been there. Tried everything to forget about the past and move on. Couldn't do it. She will continue to say all the right things, but how can you believe her, she probably told you she loves you on the same day she was "with" someone else. You can try to trust her, but there is no stress in the world like wondering what she is doing, when you can't trust her word. You would think the people that tell you they love you are the ones you can trust. Good luck, I would advise you to move on, unless you can be sure that if this happens again, you can handle it.

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